MEET BRIDECHILLA LISA
When asked why she's interested in sharing her wedding planning experiences with the Bridechilla community Lisa says;
'I have a lot of ideas swirling around in my head. My fiancé and I are both musicians, and so music is going to be a central part of our ceremony (and reception). We're doing some things that might be a little bit unconventional. I am also a health coach and feel especially drawn to all the issues around food, fitness, and body image that inevitably come up during the wedding planning process! Gosh, even my clients who are expecting to be GUESTS at weddings feel pressure to turn into supermodels before the big day.
What IS that??!!
I'm also about to enter into an interracial marriage (my fiancee is Asian), so...dare I say it... I might even want to write about race. As you can see, I have a lot of thoughts and have not yet gotten them into an organized flow, but that's part of the reason I love the idea of writing for the blog. I would absolutely love the chance to sort through some of these swirling thoughts through writing and share them with my fellow bridechillas out there!
Well I say BRING IT ON LISA!
WHEN ARE YOU GETTING HITCHED?
ANY WEDDING DEAL BREAKERS AND NON-NEGOTIABLES?
Hmm, not sure about this one. Good question!
The music and food must be good.
The ceremony must be meaningful to us as a couple. And our guests' comfort and enjoyment is a top priority!
ANY TRUTH BOMBS AFTER GETTING ENGAGED?
This wedding planning phase has been a roller coaster! I have been engaged since New Year's Eve, and I'd say since then I've been almost constantly both euphorically happy and maniacally stressed, sometimes within the same day. It's just completely new territory for both of us I think, and we are learning more about each other in the process.
The happiest moments happen when we pause and remember the reason we are doing this!
It's easy for that to get lost in the endless wedding to-do list tasks. Some days I love wedding planning and am basking in the glory of this special time, but other days I loathe it and wish we could just elope!
ARE YOU HIRING A WEDDING PLANNER OR COORDINATOR?
I talked with a few wedding planners, but they were just too expensive for me to justify hiring.
We wound up hiring a day-of coordinator who was highly recommended by a friend.
I also have a lot of confidence in both the manager of our venue and our caterer, both of whom have endless chains of glowing reviews on various wedding planning websites.
So I am hopeful that at least on the day-of we will be well taken care of!
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST WEDDING STRESS SO FAR?
I've been pretty much stressed about everything! I use the term "bridechilla" very loosely when applied to myself because the truth is I'm only just an aspiring bridechilla. Outside I might appear chill, but inside I'm freaking out! I think that's a combination of two things: #1 my own tendency towards perfectionism combined with #2 never having planned a wedding before in my life!
I'm taking on this project that I've never had to do before, have no idea how to do it (though I have had a much better idea now thanks to the Bridechilla podcast!! ), and yet I still have unreasonable expectations of myself to somehow magically plan the perfect wedding the first (and hopefully only) time I do it!
Not knowing how much everything will cost, yet having to make decisions on things as they come up has been a big stress, as well as wading through all the wedding materials out there that make me think my wedding won't be complete without a fog machine (or a theme or a spray tan or a pony ride, or a whatever the latest craze is!). This podcast has been a godsend to balance out all the other voices in the wedding industry that make me think my wedding won't be good enough if I don't do x, y, and z. My fiancee has been somewhat helpful too 🙂
WHO IS YOUR FAVOURITE WEDDING SUPPLIER SO FAR?
Our officiant!! Zita Christian of Moon River Rituals. I hope to write more about her in blogs.
BEST WEDDING HACK?
I'm not sure if this qualifies as a hack... Since we are musicians, all of our friends are also musicians (string players). We are sort of merging the roles of bridesmaids/groomsmen with the musicians roles. There will be a groom's string quintet made up of his closest friends, and a bride's string quartet made up of my closest friends. They will play for me as I walk down the aisle, and they'll probably play some music together too. No matching dresses or anything. I might give them a color palette to refer to, but I don't really feel like all the attendant craziness is necessary!
WHAT IS THE BEST BRIDECHILLA ADVICE THAT HAS REALLY HELPED YOU OUT DURING YOUR WEDDING PLANNING?
I believe it was the interview with Meg Keene of A Practical Wedding. I love her advice (read her book too) that people will not remember what your wedding looked like, they will remember how they felt. So much of the wedding industry is trying to sell you things that will make your wedding look pretty. When I stop and think about how I want people to feel instead it takes the pressure off and makes things a whole lot more fun!
HAVE THERE BEEN ANY ISSUES THAT HAVE AFFECTED YOUR RELATIONSHIP DURING YOUR WEDDING PLANNING JOURNEY?
It's definitely been a learning experience for us. It's been interesting to see the way each of us handles stress and also what types of things stress each of us out. Sometimes I'm surprised by things that stress Jeff out, so yes, it's been a learning experience. I think it has affected our relationship, hopefully overall brought us closer, but I'm not sure I can articulate exactly how. I'd love to think more and write about it though because it seems like an important thing to think about!
BEST BOOK YOU'VE READ THIS YEAR?
A Practical Wedding by Meg Keene
Getting engaged is exhilarating…until it sets in that a wedding costs three times what you thought, and takes five to ten times the effort it reasonably should. And then there are the expectations: from calligraphy invitations to satin chair-covers, all those things that Must Be Done or everyone will be Horribly Offended. Or will they?A Practical Wedding helps you create the wedding you want—without going broke or crazy in the process.
All the Light We Cannot See- by Anthony Doerr
From the highly acclaimed, multiple award-winning Anthony Doerr, the beautiful, stunningly ambitious instant New York Times bestseller about a blind French girl and a German boy whose paths collide in occupied France as both try to survive the devastation of World War II.
Ten years in the writing, a National Book Award finalist, All the Light We Cannot See is a magnificent, deeply moving novel from a writer “whose sentences never fail to thrill” (Los Angeles Times).