398- Wedding Planning Q&A

by Aleisha

One characteristic of the Bridechilla community is their desire and commitment to avoid wedding drama. There is ample opportunity for stress and drama to arise when planning a wedding. On this Q&A episode of the Bridechilla podcast, Aleisha answers questions about areas of potential drama and how to steer clear of them before and during the wedding. Hear voicemails concerning picking a venue, dealing with frendors, and how to handle disapproving family members. 

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There has to be something that, you close your eyes and picture the day. Where is that place. There has to be something that differentiates them

How to pick the right venue for your wedding

One of the hardest parts of wedding planning is deciding on a venue. Do you have a destination wedding, pick a trendy, instagramable location, or go with a more sentimental venue? Bridechilla Lauren is torn between two venues, one that she loves but has no attachment to, and another in the town where she and her fiancé met. However, she already has a venue booked. Why is she still considering another venue? Aleisha helps Lauren think through some of the pros and cons between venues and gives advice for choosing the right place.

I’m just a big believer, when you are hiring wedding vendors, whether you know them personally or not, you need to be able to rely on them

Should you hire a friendor?

Hiring a freindor, or a friend who is also a vendor, can be both a blessing and a curse. It could be mutually beneficial. You may get a discounted service and your friend gets some experience and exposure, which is especially important if they are just starting out. There is a danger that you might not get the quality of service you want or your friendship could be strained or damaged in the process. Should you use friendors? If so, what is the best way to go about it? Hear Aliesha’s answer to that and other questions from the Bridechilla community on this Q&A episode of the podcast. 

Just treat this relationship as a friendly but also a business relationship. You are absolutely a-ok to do that.

Photo by Annie Spratt 

I think weddings are a really good time to start asserting yourself in a way that you deserve to assert yourself.

Avoiding family wedding drama

Family can be one of the biggest sources of wedding drama. Bridechilla Ann is struggling with the demands of family while planning her wedding. She feels the obligation to follow their advice about the ceremony and to invite people she doesn’t really want to attend. While the goal is to have your wedding be only what you want without any obligation to anyone else, sometimes that is just not possible. Aleisha discusses how to still have the wedding you want while balancing the responsibility you have to your family. 

Photo by Haley Phelps

Keys to conflict resolution in wedding planning

Avoiding wedding drama often means that you have to address problems and issues head on. Almost everyone wants to avoid conflict. However, in life, relationships, and wedding planning, conflict is inevitable. Aleisha encourages Bridechillas to use the wedding as an opportunity to be assertive and learn how to effectively handle conflict. One helpful solution is to not consider it a fight, but rather a resolution. Listen to helpful advice about that and other wedding planning issues on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

Sometime it’s good if you can turn the question onto the other person and ask them ‘What would you do if you were in my position?

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Show Highlights

  • [0:58] Aleisha talks about the booth she records in and the uncomfortable stool that she sits on to record the podcast

  • [1:46] Today’s episode is a Q&A episode, addressing questions from the Bridechilla community

  • [2:42] Bridechilla Lauren asks for help in deciding between two venues, and how to choose the one that aligns with their priorities

  • [6:02] When you have a venue already booked, why would you continue to look for another venue?

  • [7:50] Hailey asks how to handle her friend/make up artist who has been disrespectful to her during the planning process

  • [10:45] Aliesha addresses whether or not taking back a plus one invite for a friend is contentious

  • [11:38] No one likes confrontation, but there is a way to be assertive without being confrontational

  • [15:00] Bridechilla Anna asks about potential missing pages in the field guide for planning food

  • [21:15] Ann is struggling with obligation to her family and difficulty finding a church while planning her wedding

  • [26:22] What do you do when your important family members don’t approve of your life choices? Do you still invite them to the wedding and risk having drama?

  • [31:54] How you can use family members or your wedding planner to help alleviate family drama during the wedding

  • [32:47] Do you invite a friendor to the wedding even though you wouldn’t invite them if they weren’t a vendor

  • [36:05] Aleisha offers thanks to everyone who has been sharing the podcast with their friends and purchasing the Bridechilla field guide

  • [37:36] Bridechilla Amanda is planning her own bachelorette party and wants to know how to best accommodate her bridesmaids for the party since they aren’t all local

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

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