Author

Aleisha

Hey there, I'm Aleisha, founder and host of the Bridechilla Podcast. I am also the author of the Bridechilla Guides. I'm inspired by our community of Chillas worldwide and empowering you to 'go your own way', as Fleetwood Mac would say, in your wedding planning and beyond!

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396- Avoiding Wedding Planning Burnout

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

This week’s Bridechilla Podcast episode is all about how to avoid wedding planning burnout. We all know what it is like to feel the effects of stress. There is a mental, physical, and emotional toll. Burnout can happen at any stage in life, but wedding planning can be a particularly vulnerable time. Trying to organize and plan an event, the size and scope of which you probably have never done before, while also managing the normal aspects of life is no small task. How can you avoid burnout and enjoy the wedding planning process. Hear some of Aleisha’s tips on this podcast.

There is no right way to do all this stuff.

Listen to the Bridechilla Podcast episode

It’s all about perspective

There is a lot of pressure to have the most amazing wedding ever. The internet is full of picturesque weddings that look incredible and effortless. Many of those pictures are staged and unrealistic. Wedding planning is highly involved, but it shouldn’t be considered the peak of achievement. It is important to keep the wedding in perspective with all of the other responsibilities and accomplishments in your life. This perspective will help you from being overwhelmed and give you the freedom to plan the kind of wedding you want. 

Even if you are not feeling stressed...it’s also good to just be aware of how you’re feeling and to take a little moment to check in and plan for the future when it may very well happen

Photo by Victoria Heath​

What are the symptoms of burnout

Burnout can sneak up on you if you aren’t paying attention. You can continue to push, trying to manage all of your responsibilities without taking the time to care for yourself. However, if you take a moment and assess, you will notice the symptoms of stress and burnout. Aleisha talks about several symptoms of burnout, including what she calls “stress breath”. Listen to this episode to hear other symptoms and how you can identify them in your life. 

The pros and cons of a wedding planning timeline 

One way to avoid wedding planning burnout is to utilize a wedding planning timeline. They can help you prioritize your tasks and make decisions as needed. However, timelines aren’t perfect. Every wedding is different. Timelines are simply tools to be used, and should be adapted to your unique situation. It is ok if you don’t follow the timeline exactly. Listen to this episode to hear the ways timelines can be both helpful and harmful, and how you can use them in a way that reduces stress during wedding planning. 

With wedding planning, something that a lot of us hasn’t done before, you go through this stage where you are like ‘what now? What do i do?

Photo by Jacob Postuma

Wedding planning limbo

During the wedding planning process, there will be a time when you will start to feel overwhelmed. You will feel like you haven’t done enough, or that you don’t know what to do next. Be encouraged that this feeling is normal. Every couple planning a wedding has experienced this. However, when you reach this wedding planning limbo, don’t give in to the stress. Aleisha gives helpful ideas for what to do when you reach this stage of planning. Listen to hear about that and much more on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

Timelines should be something that are helpful to be able to tick off different tasks but you shouldn’t feel like you have to do something at a certain stage because every event is different.

Listen to the Bridechilla Podcast episode

Show Highlights

  • [0:43] Aleisha introduces this episode’s topic, avoiding wedding planning burnout

  • [3:02] Wedding planning isn’t the peak achievement of life and shouldn’t be treated as such

  • [5:05] Burnout can happen quickly, especially when you are planning a wedding while also trying to balance all of the other commitments and obligations you have in everyday life. 

  • [7:14] Aleisha describes the token symptoms of burnout and how she senses it coming.

  • [11:36] How to effectively use a wedding planning timeline without letting them overwhelm you. 

  • [15:38] Streamlining your wedding planning and completing small tasks can help alleviate stress

  • [21:40] The importance of clarity in avoiding burnout

  • [23:08] The stage of engagement when most couples hit burnout in wedding planning.

  • [25:48] How regular should communication with vendors or coordinator happen?

  • [29:54] The physical symptoms of stress and burnout. 

  • [32:03] Aleisha talks about the new group she has set up for the Bridechilla community called Bosschilla. 

  • [34:00] How to get in touch with Aleisha

For me, one of the big symptoms of burnout is physical, feeling tired, feeling puffy and bloated, feeling vague and reactive

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by mari lezhava​

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395- Wedding Planning Q&A with Leah Weinberg

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

On this episode of the Bridechilla podcast, guest Leah Weinberg, founder of Color Pop Events, joins the show for some wedding planning Q&A. Leah took her expertise and attention to detail as a commercial real estate attorney and turned it into a business planning beautiful, detailed, and stress free weddings for couples in New York. She lends her advice to the Bridechilla Community about how to deal with family members you don’t like, managing the wedding budget, and how to make the last few weeks of planning the wedding stress free.

Listen to episode 395 of Bridechilla

How to have the non-traditional wedding of your dreams

Couples often make the mistake of trying to please their family members or friends with their wedding. However, the wedding really is all about them and, as such, should only include what they want. Bridechilla Nat writes in and shares her nontraditional wedding and how going to 22 weddings in 11 years helped her define the type of wedding she wants. If you are wanting something different and non-traditional for your wedding but don’t know how to go about it, be sure to listen to this episode.

You want an olive branch, just go to dinner. Go to the movies. Do something. She doesn’t have to be a bridesmaid in your wedding.

Photo by Devon Divine 

Don’t let your family hijack your wedding plans

Family members can be a blessing and a curse. While they can be a source of support and encouragement at times, they can also be a major source of stress. How do you deal with family members who have unrealistic expectations or who make ridiculous requests? Bridechilla Emily asks how to deal with her brother who wants her to include his fiance as a bridesmaid. The trouble is that Emily doesn’t even get along with her. Hear Aleisha and Leah’s advice about this issue and much more. 

I hate that the wedding planning process makes people question themselves. In so many ways they question their decisions, their appearance, and sometimes their relationships.

Photo by Rachel Lees

Planning and sticking to the wedding budget

Whenever there is a bridechilla wedding planning Q&A episode, the topic of budget always seems to come up. How do you set an appropriate budget? How do you stay on budget when planning a wedding? How can you be on the same page with your partner about the budget? These are all very important questions that not only help with wedding planning, but contribute to marital unity in the future. Alexa and her fiance are struggling to agree on the wedding size and budget. Aleisha and Leah offer their encouragement and support as they answer Alexa’s question. 

It’s a lot of money on a one time thing and you want to make sure you are spending it on something you want and that makes you happy

How to make the last week before the wedding stress free

Wedding planning can be quite a long a tedious process. But the payoff is hopefully spectacular, memorable event with loved ones to celebrate your marriage with your partner. When getting down to the last week of planning, it is important to reduce the stress so that you can focus on being in the moment and enjoying the wedding day. During the wedding planning Q&A episode, Aleisha and Leah give advice for how to approach the week before the wedding. Hear that and much more on the Bridechilla podcast. 

I think people may not realize how busy they are going to be that last week. I highly encourage if you are able to take off that whole week from work.

ASMR Wedding Planning 

Leah and Aleisha spoke about ASMR, Autonomous sensory meridian response and whether they found it relaxing. Leah thinks that Aleisha may have a second (or third career as an ASMR voice over person), Aleisha is less convinced. In the show, Aleisha shares a clip by Isabel imagination ASMR, a You-tuber who focuses on creating (very well received) ASMR videos.

Listen to the episode

Show Highlights

  • [0:39] Aleisha introduces the episode and special guest Leah Weinberg from Color Pop Events
  • [3:29] Nat has been to 22 weddings in 11 years and describes how just and her fiance are not into a traditional wedding
  • [5:50] Leah talks about how the wedding planning process makes people question themselves and discusses her book that addresses that issue
  • [7:50] Nat shares the ways she is planning an untraditional wedding, rejecting people’s advice or expectations so that she and her fiance can have the wedding they want.
  • [10:17] Emily asks for advice for dealing with her brothers fiance and how to avoid having her as a bridesmaid.
  • [13:18] Recently engaged Alexa asks how to get on the same page with her fiance about the type of wedding and how to utilize their budget. 
  • [17:04] Aleisha warns against the loan sharks who offer loans or credit to pay for a wedding.
  • [23:32] Aleisha and Leah talk about their reaction to ASMR
  • [27:05] Erin asks about how to approach the “homestretch” of planning her wedding.
  • [31:28] How do you stay focused at work when you have a wedding coming up?
  • [35:07] Aleisha and Leah talk about what they pitched to Alt Summit

Meet This Episode’s Guest

Leah Weinberg is the founder of Color Pop Events, a wedding planning business dedicated to bringing dream weddings to life in New York and New Jersey. Leah took her expertise and attention to detail she developed  in commercial real estate law and turned it into planning unforgettable weddings with professionalism and style. Her calm spirit and unflappable demeanor takes the stress out of the wedding so that couples can fully experience their special day together. 

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by  Kendra Allen

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394- Q&A – Making Good Wedding Planning Decisions

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

Whether it’s trying to find the right dress, book the perfect venue, or plan the most beautiful ceremony, there are a lot of decisions to be made when planning your wedding. Often these decisions can lead to stress and anxiety. It doesn’t have to be this way. The Bridechilla podcast is here to help you stress less and enjoy the process of planning your wedding.
This episode Aleisha answers wedding planning questions about weekday weddings and guests leaving early, rehearsal dinner speeches and when to not invite family members who might be antagonistic or cause trouble on your wedding day.

Listen to episode 394 of Bridechilla

How to make a weekday wedding work

Madeline is a fellow Bridechilla and Australian who has a question about her venue. While most weddings are held on the weekend, is it possible to have a weekday wedding? What impact will that have on the guests that you want to come? There are certain advantages both with the venue and with vendors if you book your wedding on a weekday. There are also ways that you can make it a bit easier on your guests while still having the wedding you want. Hear Aleisha’s advice on making the unconventional but potentially beneficial decision of having a weekday wedding.

“I really support you in booking a weekday wedding. I know they are not as convenient as a weekend wedding for guests. However as a couple planning a wedding, and working with vendors, it could be a really good opportunity to score a venue that you really like that’s otherwise not available

Photo by Jonathan Borba 

A wedding before the wedding

Tradition is only as good as the people who intend to use it. If particular traditions don’t mean anything to you, then why use them? Bridechilla Katrina and her fiance are nontraditional and want to include that part of their personality in their wedding plans. She asks Aleisha about the idea of eloping prior to the big wedding ceremony. Rather than abandoning the event with their family and guests, they want to have a small private ceremony first. However, that doesn’t necessarily sit well with some family members. Aleisha shares her thoughts on how to best handle this nontraditional approach during this podcast. 

You can have the night off child care regardless of whose kids you are feeding...

What to do with the kids? 

Mariah is engaged to be engaged to her fiance who has kids of his own. During the wedding, she’d prefer not to be at a table with the kids. She doesn’t want to have to parent or have kid-inclusive conversations on a day that is all about her and her fiance. She asks for Aleisha’s opinion on this desire and for advice on how to best accomplish this without upsetting her fiance or other family members. Listen to this episode to hear Aleisha discuss this and other questions from the Bridechilla community.

Photo by Mikael Kristenson 

Facing feuding family members

The topic of family is one that comes up in almost every Q&A episode that we have on the Bridechilla podcast. Families can be supportive, helpful, and fantastic overall. Or they can be difficult, petty, and a living nightmare. Bridechilla Hannah has two family issues that she is having to deal with while planning her wedding. One involves honoring grandparents, while the other involves feuding brothers. Hear the details of this unique situation and what Aleisha has to say about it on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

Listen to episode 394 of Bridechilla

Show Highlights

  • [0:27] Aleisha introduces this episode of the podcast, which is the ever popular wedding planning Q&A episode.

  • [2:20] Madeline asks about the potential having a Thursday wedding and if people would be inclined to leave the reception early because it’s not on the weekend.

  • [6:18] Aleisha gives practical solutions for how to adjust your wedding plans to maintain the magic and make it more accommodating for guests

  • [8:17] Katrina and her fiance are untraditional and want Aleisha’s thoughts about eloping prior to the big wedding ceremony. 

  • [13:41] Mariah who is engaged to be engaged and asks about seating arrangements and what to do about her husband-to-be’s kids at the wedding.  

  • [22:54] Gina asks for guidance regarding speeches for both the rehearsal dinner and wedding day for their intimate wedding in Greece. 

  • [27:00] Bridechilla Hannah asks questions about dealing with family issues while planning her wedding. She talks about her grandparents and estranged uncles. 

  • [31:33] The wedding is all about you and your comfort level. Aleisha gives advice for dealing with volatile family members. 

  • [33:07] Don’t forget, the Bridechilla pack with the two books that Aleisha has produced is available. 

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

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393- Planning for the Unforeseen Circumstances

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

Though you envision your wedding day as being nothing short of perfect, it is wise to also planning for unforeseen circumstances. No one wants to imagine the things that can go wrong on their special day. However, there are certain events or relationships that can cause issues. Rather than being naive and unprepared, work with your friends, family members, and vendors to develop contingencies so that you can still have a beautiful, magical day. On this episode of the Bridechilla podcast, guest Emily Sullivan or Emily Sullivan Events, joins Aleisha to discuss how brides and grooms can best plan for unforeseen circumstances. 

Listen to episode 393 of Bridechilla

While there are certain circumstances that you simply can’t plan for, you can plan for the eventuality that something will go wrong. Emily says that in her experience, something goes wrong everyday. Building in a contingency plan is what keeps a minor hiccup from turning into a complete train wreck. Emily suggests that the best way to plan for unforeseen circumstances is to start with the best, high quality vendors. When picking out the people who will supply or serve your wedding, make sure that they have the experience and expertise to both avoid unnecessary drama and know how to handle it if it arises. 
When you are trying to get a deal and something bigger comes along, that vendor is going to take that bigger thing because they don’t necessarily have the right work ethic

What situations should you prepare for?

During their conversation, Aleisha and Emily discuss the types of unforeseen circumstances that could threaten your wedding day. Emily’s event company is based out of New Orleans, Louisiana, so she quickly cites natural disasters as one of those threats. It could also be a vendor cancelation or no-show, a rogue family member, or a host of other unexpected events. Hear their list of possible wedding wreckers so that you can better prepare for these things during your wedding. 

I am a big advocate of vendor boundaries. It doesn’t necessarily mean your vendors are available to you 24 hours a day.

Photo by Dmitriy Nushtaev

Working with the right people is a great first step

One of the keys to avoiding or handling unforeseen circumstances is hiring the right vendors. Everything about the wedding day hinges on and celebrates great relationships. However, having great vendors doesn’t necessarily mean that they are at your disposal, night and day. When establishing a relationship with a vendor you want to be sure and respect appropriate boundaries. You can’t expect them to be available all the time, nor can you hold them responsible for issues that might arise. Emily and Aleisha talk about ways to create a great working relationship with vendors and how to mitigate risk during this podcast. 

One of the first things we tell our clients when they hire us is go ahead and get this wedding insurance policy, so that you don’t have to worry about that if it comes down to it.

Disasters aren't always natural...

One common unforeseen circumstances that Emily has seen during her time as a planner comes in the form of difficult family members. Every family has their own share of outliers who, given the opportunity, can cause real trouble. It is important to let you wedding planner or vendors know ahead of time about the potential rogue family members so that they can help formulate a plan. As you are planning your wedding, be sure you listen to this episode and consider what unforeseen circumstances you should be preparing for on your special day. 

The best bet when dealing with family drama is don’t pretend it’s not there. Deal with it

Photo by Sweet Ice Cream Photography

Trust your gut when you are hiring your vendors. Do your research, listen to what your gut is saying and go in that direction.

Listen to the episode

  • [0:34] Aleisha introduces today’s guest, Emily Sullivan, owner of Emily Sullivan events in New Orleans, Louisiana

  • [3:07] During the beginning stages of wedding planning, how can you protect yourself and prepare for things that could go wrong?

  • [6:23] The role of trust in picking vendors is critical in helping mitigate issues that could arise during planning or on the wedding day

  • [9:13] Aleisha and Emily talk through the major types of unforeseen circumstances that could threaten your wedding 

  • [12:45] The importance of wedding insurance and how it can help protect you in the event that something threatens your plans

  • [19:24] Get the audio version of the Bridechilla Wedding Planning Survival guide on audible

  • [22:10] What are some warning signs that you should look for when hiring vendors

  • [23:33] Vendors and clients should show mutual respect and have definite boundaries

  • [27:27] Emily tells a story about a client who wanted to go against her advice and how she dealt with that.

  • [30:02] What do you do if a vendor cancels? What do you do if you don’t have a wedding planner to help you deal with vendors? 

  • [34:07] If you have a cancelation, utilize the expertise of the other vendors to help find a replacement

  • [35:35] How to deal with unreasonable or misbehaving family members. 

  • [41:02] If you think there might be an issue with a family member, think through it beforehand and how you might deal with it. 

  • [43:03] How to get in touch with Emily Sullivan

Meet This Episode’s Guest

Emily Sullivan is the owner of Emily Sullivan Events in New Orleans, Louisiana. She started planning weddings in 2006 and has become one of the premiere planners in the area. She is committed to evolving with the times, keeping herself and team relevant within the wedding industry. Her experience, expertise, and personality are a perfect combination to help brides and grooms plan the wedding they want while keeping them calm and secure during the process. 

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by Ashley Schulze

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392- Q&A- How to Feel Better About Yourself While Planning Your Wedding

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

Whether you are planning a wedding or just going through something stressful, it is nice to hear that other people are dealing with similar issues. Sometimes you hear about other people’s problems and it makes you feel better. Helping you get through the wedding planning process is what we are all about on the Bridechilla podcast. That’s why we are sharing problems and questions from the Bridechilla community. On this episode, Aleisha addresses questions about assigning roles and responsibilities to your wedding party, abandoning the first look, and how to know how many invitees will actually be at the wedding.

Listen to episode 392 of Bridechilla

Pick and choose your traditions

When planning your wedding, you might decide there are certain traditions that you don’t want to adhere to. Is it crazy to have a non-traditional wedding. There are many wedding traditions that you might choose to include in your ceremony. However, many customs might not make sense or be meaningful to you. Your wedding is about you, so you can choose to do whatever you want. Bridechilla Kelly doesn’t want just a traditional maid-of-honor. She wants three. Hear Aleisha’s advice for how to define roles for the three maids and how to make this unique arrangement work. 

Photo by Miguel Ángel Hernández

No matter what label we are putting on people we are asking to help, the big thing is having a discussion with them about their expectations and your expectations.

Skip the secrets

Another tradition that a lot of couples choose to do is to keep the bride’s dress a secret until the day of the wedding. They often do a “first-look” prior to the wedding and photographs. However, one bridechilla contacted Aleisha to ask what they should do if they don’t want to participate in a first look. In fact, they don’t want to keep the dress a secret at all. There is no right or wrong way to customize your wedding. Hear what Aleisha’s thoughts about skipping the dress secret and abandoning the first look.  

Plan to pause with your partner

Another way to feel better about yourself when planning your wedding is to plan for quiet moments for you and your partner during the wedding day. There is so much going on during the day, it is easy to reach the end and not remember anything. Though you want your guests to have a good time, the wedding is really about you and your partner. Aleisha encourages finding moments during the day to just pause together, reflect, and ensure that your day is truly memorable.

Photo by Jonathan Borba 

Find a place for the parents

You might think you are juggling a lot of people and relationships for your wedding. But do you have 7 parents to include in your wedding? That’s exactly how many Bridechilla Kristen has. Kristen wants to know how to include all of the parents and step parents in meaningful ways while still keeping the wedding special and according to her wishes. Hear Aleisha’s answer to that and many other questions during this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

Look at the day and don’t feel an obligation when it comes to having to appease all these people. That goes for everyone really

Listen to the episode

Show Highlights

  • [0:30] After looking at her inbox, Aleisha decided that another wedding planning Q&A episode was in order.

  • [2:16] Bridechilla Stephanie wants to know a special and creative way to ask a long-distance friend to be a part of her wedding.

  • [6:11] Kelly asks for ideas for how to have three maids-of-honors and how to make each one feel special. 

  • [10:10] Is it crazy to not want to keep your dress a secret for the first look? 

  • [12:32] Courtney calls to get Aleisha’s advice on how to plan for how many people on the guest list will actually attend.

  • [22:40] Get the hardback wedding planning guide written by Aleisha at Bridechillstore.com.

  • [24:02] Kristen is getting married in July and wants to know how to deal with having 7 parents in their wedding and how to assign roles. 

  • [29:41] Aleisha invites the Bridechilla community to continue submitting questions, as there are more Q&A episodes to come.

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

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391- Wedding Planning Q&A Jennifer Charles and Kimberly Allen

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

The wedding planning process is all about creating your wedding memories before the big day happens. Jennifer Charles and Kimberly Allen of Something Fabulous join the Bridechilla podcast to answer questions and help you think about planning your wedding with the end in mind. Since 2002, they have been helping couples and corporations design unique events that focus on the why, not just the how. During this episode, they answer questions from the Bridechilla community about destination weddings, how to maintain your vision during the wedding process, and how to deal with difficult family relationships. 

Listen to episode 391 of Bridechilla

How well-suited are you for a destination wedding?

Planning a wedding requires a lot of organization and attention to detail. A destination wedding requires a completely different approach to planning. Kate asks how to handle the grooms tux for her destination wedding. Should they purchase the suit prior to leaving and travel with it, or try to get a suit at the location of the wedding? These types of issues should be considered during the planning process to ensure a smooth experience. Hear Jennifer’s and Kimberly’s thoughts about this question and much more. 

What is the memory you are trying to make and how do you want to feel about your wedding when all is said and done?”

Creating one last wedding memory

For many couples, the most important part of the wedding is the people attending. One Bridechilla shares her concern with a family member who is extremely sick and might not live to see their wedding. She and her spouse-to-be are considering holding a special pre-wedding ceremony just so they can have a memorable experience with their family member before they pass. Jennifer and Kimberly share some ideas for how they can create a special wedding memory during this difficult time.

On your wedding day, you should not be worrying about your decor and what table number goes where

Maintain your wedding vision

Because there are so many decisions and so many options, the vision you have for your wedding can easily be compromised. In a month, or ten years when you look back at your wedding experience, you want to be sure that you created the wedding memories you wanted. Whether it be dealing with overly-involved family members or difficult memories, Jennifer and Kimberly have some great tips for how to maintain the vision for your wedding throughout the planning process. 

Photo by Bekir Temel

If you are acting out of love and respect, you can’t be wrong. It’s your day!

Planning with love and respect

Jennifer and Kimberly have a philosophy of wedding planning that works for everyone. Their professional background and extensive experience has helped refine their approach to creating wedding memories. As long as you start with the end in mind, treat everyone with love and respect, and let the logistics serve your vision, your wedding can be the unique and authentic event you dream it to be. Listen to stories from their experience and learn from their expertise on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast.

Show Highlights

  • [0:50] Introduction of this episode’s guests, Jennifer and Kimberly from Something Fabulous Events. 

  • [2:56] Jennifer and Kimberly share their backgrounds, how they started Something Fabulous and how their backgrounds help them do what they do. 

  • [ 7:07] Bridechilla Kate asks about how to handle purchasing suits for a destination wedding.

  • [12:54] Aleisha, Kimberly and Jennifer answer a question about family submitted by an anonymous bridechilla. 

  • [24:15] How do you maintain your vision throughout the wedding planning process?

  • [30:46] Your personal style never goes out of style.

  • [35:50] How can you do a room flip for a reception at your wedding venue?

  • [38:19] Using a coordinator or a professional to help during the day and how they can help take care of room flip logistics. 

  • [41:55] You can have your way while still maintaining an attitude of love and respect. 

  • [45:00] How to get in touch with Jennifer and Kimberly

 

Listen to episode 391 of Bridechilla

Meet This Episode’s Guests

Jennifer and Kimberly are sisters and the founders of Something Fabulous, which is an event and wedding planning management service. They started designing experiences together in 2002 and have now done thousands of events. Their goal is to help individuals create a truly unique and one-of-a-kind event that tells an authentic story. They have an award winning team who can help create a beautiful event from start to finish. 

Show image by Bekir Temel

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

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390- Creating Your Wedding Mood Board with Oleta Collins

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

There are a ton of resources available to help you when you are when creating your wedding mood board. On this episode of the Bridechilla podcast, guest Oleta Collins from Flourishing Art joins Aleisha to talk about the best ways to go about creating a mood board. With pinterest, instagram, and a whole host of wedding related websites, blogs, and podcasts, there is a treasure trove of ideas that you can pull from. Sorting through and knowing which ideas are realistic and within your budget is the real challenge. Oleta shares advice from her wedding planning experience on how to create the most helpful wedding mood board. 

Listen to episode 390 of Bridechilla

I want to see what they like, what they love, what their inspiration is, but I want to see the dislikes just as much as the likes.

What do you like? What don't you like?

A picture is worth a thousand words, especially when it comes to planning a wedding. They can help communicate a look or design you’d like to include in your wedding. They can also stir your creative juices to help create something completely unique and original. When developing your mood board, Oleta suggests not only looking for ideas you really like, but also including some images or things that you don’t like. This will help your vendors better capture the vision you are trying to accomplish for your wedding.

Photo by Annie Gray

Don't be overwhelmed by styled shoots

One of the drawbacks of sites like pinterest and instagram is that they host staged, produced photographs. Many of these images have been painstakingly created, but are incredibly unrealistic to pull off in a real wedding. Unfortunately, these photos can create expectations that do not match the budget needed to pull off such an idea. It is important for couples to have a good understanding of their budget even as they create their mood board so they can then select ideas that are manageable. Oleta says that with an unlimited budget, anything is possible, but most couples don’t have that, so budget must be considered. 

No is an option when there’s no budget. If you have a budget, anything is achievable.

Photo by Annie Spratt 

Always have a contingency plan and budget!

There are two important factors to consider when working with vendors to establish wedding budgets and plans. The first factor is contingencies. Every wedding budget should include a contingency line item. Hear Oleta and Aleisha discuss the likelihood of going over budget and how to handle that during this conversation. The second consideration is bad weather or natural disasters that could potentially derail your wedding plans. Listen to this episode for tips on how to plan for these types of often unexpected events. 

If you are looking at having this amazing, dramatic, wonderful night and you want to remember it for the rest of your life, make sure you have professionals that are going to cover you.

Want to know all the questions to ask your vendors? Download now.

Hiring the 'right' people to make your vision happen

When planning your wedding, it is really fun to dream big and consider what fun and exciting ideas you can include in your wedding. Oleta shares some of the most unique ideas that couples have asked her to include in their weddings. In order to accomplish these things, having the right professionals involved is essential. Going to the flower market on the morning of your wedding trying to pull together decorations is a bad idea. Hire the right people to set your dream in motion and then enjoy your day. Hear all about this and much more on the Bridechilla podcast. 

Show Highlights

  • [0:50] Introduction of guest Oleta Collins and how she started Flourishing Art

  • [4:47] How to start your wedding planning process without being overwhelmed and ensuring that they are asking the right questions

  • [7:57] What kinds of dislikes should you be prepared to share with vendors when showing them your mood boards

  • [10:27] Style shoots are beautiful but can be logistically unrealistic, so expectations need to meet reality when planning

  • [13:41] Oleta discusses how she helps couples understand the budgetary needs to pull off their dream wedding

  • [16:54] Considering the wedding budget and building in a contingency line  

  • [19:40] Make sure that your vendors have insurance so that you and your guests are covered in the event of bad weather or natural disasters

  • [27:48] Oleta shares some of the flashy, big ideas that couples have asked her to accomplish for their wedding

  • [32:50] How many images or pieces of inspiration should you include on your mood board?

  • [37:33] The importance of getting professional to help plan your wedding

  • [43:31] How people can get in touch with Oleta  

Listen to episode 390 of Bridechilla

Meet this episode's guest

A passion for floral design started early for Oleta, with her first job at a family member’s flower shop at the age of 12. Although it was initially just for spending money, she quickly discovered her knack for arranging blooms and never stopped. Since those early days, Oleta has worked on TV and movie set designs, managed the largest design studio in LA, and earned her credentials from the American Institute of Floral Design. Based in Bakersfield, California, she has brought the LA flair to her rural
hometown along with her fresh, new ideas and creations.
Her dream of inspiring clients is brought to life every day, as she meets and falls in love with every couple that she encounters. Oleta dedicates herself to learning the unique quirks of each client and embedding their guests’ partnership into every detail of the wedding experience. When Oleta is a part of an event team, the love she weaves into
every aspect is palpable — guests will experience the scents, colors, textures, sounds, and tastes of each couple’s dreams.
In her spare time, you can find Oleta serving up a lob on the nearest pickleball court or snuggling her plethora of furry and feathered loved ones that she rescued with her husband. In fact, if you come by the shop, you may get to meet one of their pups!

Website | Facebook | Instagram 

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

http://www.swankybadger.com

Show image by Nikiya Christie 

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389- Wedding Photography Q&A with Cavin Elizabeth Part 2

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

One of Bridchilla’s most popular topics (and guests), wedding photographer Cavin Elizabeth, joins the Bridechilla podcast to answer more wedding photography questions. Once word got out to the Bridechilla community that Cavin Elizabeth was joining the show, the questions flooded in. Cavin has tons of wedding photography experience and wisdom from which she shares advice. During this episode, she answers questions about how to trust your wedding photographer, the importance of contracts, whether or not to tip your vendors, and how to plan the wedding day timeline with your wedding photographer.  
(Listen and read the Part 1 blog here)

Listen to episode 389 of the Bridechilla Podcast

Let them (the photographer) be in charge. There’s a reason you hired them. If you don’t trust them to do their jobs then you probably should not have hired them

Hire who you trust, trust who you hire

Bridechilla Jackie asks Cavin how to give a photographer guidance about what kind of pictures they want while still trusting them to do their work well. Cavin encourages couples not to try to micromanage their wedding photographers, especially on the day of the wedding. While it is ok to give them some of your thoughts and ideas, it is best to trust that, if they are professionals, they know how to do their job. Cavin says if you trust them enough to hire them, trust them enough to do their job without micromanaging. 

Bridechilla 389- Wedding Photography Q&A with Cavin Elizabeth Part 2

Image by Cavin Elizabeth

There’s all kinds of tipping alternatives that show your gratitude if you don’t or can’t spend any more money on tips.

Tips for Tipping your Wedding Photographer

Tipping vendors is a recurring question that comes up in the Bridechilla community. Should you tip your wedding photographer? If so, how much should you tip? When and how do you give them the tip? Cavin gives advice from her experience of receiving tips for her wedding photography. She also gives some great tipping alternatives that can allow the couple to show gratitude without shelling out even more money. Hear her advice about tipping and much more on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

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Do not hire anybody for your wedding without a contract.

The facts about contracts

When hiring a vendor, you want to ensure that you are getting exactly what you pay for. Even if you are hiring a freelance photographer, it is essential that you have a contract. The contract should lay out the terms of service, any contingencies, and all of the specifics of what you are paying for from that vendor. If a vendor doesn’t offer a contract, you should ask them for one, or even draw one up yourself. Listen to Cavin’s advice about contracts with vendors on this podcast.  

Bridechilla 389- Wedding Photography Q&A with Cavin Elizabeth Part 2

Image by Cavin Elizabeth

Anything that is sensitive that could possibly come up when that photographer is dealing with the family, especially in family photos, they need to know.

Dysfunctional family photos

Nobody has the perfect family. Everybody has weird or difficult family dynamics of some sort. A wedding offers a unique opportunity for those dysfunctions to be on full display. How can you deal with difficult or dysfunctional family dynamics. Cavin encourages Bridechillas to give the photographer as much information as possible in advance of the wedding day so that they can help avoid any awkward or harmful situations. Hear all about that and much more on this wedding photography Q&A episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

Bridechilla 389- Wedding Photography Q&A with Cavin Elizabeth Part 2

Image by Cavin Elizabeth

Do not do other people favors for your wedding. If there is something you want for your wedding, do what you want for your wedding

Listen to episode 389 of Bridechilla

Show Highlights

  • [1:46] Bridechilla Jackie asks how to work with a photographer, giving them guidance for what she and her partner want while trusting them to do their job well. 

  • [5:21] One key characteristic of being a bridechilla is treating people with kindness

  • [6:27] Chelsea asks about the rules of tipping your wedding photographer. 

  • [10:30] Cavin Elizabeth talks about the power of referrals

  • [11:57] What are some important issues that should be covered in a photographers contract. 

  • [22:41] Bridechilla asks for tips for dealing with dysfunctional family dynamics while trying to take wedding photos

  • [26:56] How to handle a difficult or potentially disruptive guest coming to your wedding

  • [28:00] When planning the wedding day timeline, how much do you involve the photographer? 

  • [32:16] How to handle frendors and family members who want to work for your wedding, when you don’t want them to?

  • [38:00] Cavin Elizabeth talks about her resources and how you can book her to photograph your wedding. 

Meet This Episode’s Guest

Cavin Elizabeth is an international wedding film and digital photographer based in San Diego. She operates a boutique studio with a focus on personal connection that makes couples more at ease while being photographed for their special day. This gives Cavin’s picture a natural, authentic and romantic look. She also wrote a book entitled A Bride’s Guide to a Picture Perfect Wedding that teaches brides how to get the most out of their wedding photography and have magazine worthy images. Catch up on Cavin's previous episode of Bridechilla, all about how to find the right wedding photographer for your wedding here. 

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by Cavin Elizabeth

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388- Wedding Planning Q&A, with Rich

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

On this episode of the Bridechilla podcast, Aleisha’s husband Rich joins the show to answer wedding questions from the Bridechilla community. Being a part of the Bridechilla community gives you access not only to Aliesha’s knowledge and insight about planning a wedding, but also a great support system of men and women who are going through a similar journey as you. During this podcast, you’ll hear questions about appropriate tipping for a European wedding, how to deal with bad customer service from a wedding venue, and engagement gift ideas for the groom.

Listen to episode 388 of Bridechilla

A wedding day is about wearing things that make you feel comfortable and fabulous.

One year countdown

The engagement period is full of excitement. You are looking forward to a great celebration and a wonderful, meaningful marriage thereafter. There can also be a lot of stress. There are so many plans to be made, vendors to book, and guests to invite. Depending on the length of your engagement, you will have to be strategic in how you prioritize your time and finances. Ellie writes in asking for Aleisha’s advice about how to go about prioritizing her planning with one year left before the wedding day.

Photo by Alvin Mahmudov

Tips on tipping

In America, it is customary to tip generously. It is a way of showing gratitude for excellent service. However, if you are planning a destination wedding in another country, you should be sure to consider their customs. Acting like an American in other countries can often be seen as rude or pretentious. Aleisha discusses the tipping customs specifically in Italy and encourages listeners to be savvy when visiting other countries. Rather than risking the chance of offending your foreign hosts, take some time to research and understand their traditions and then follow suit. Here all about that and many more Wedding Q&As on this podcast.

The last 6 months of wedding planning really flies and that’s when things happen that you might not be ready for. Even when you are really organized you still have to be a bit ninja.Enter your text here...

Putting the service back into customer service

When planning your wedding, it is important to first know what you and your partner want. Once you are in agreement, and you have set a prioritized budget, then the goal is to make your dream a reality. So what do you do when poor customer service threatens to get in the way of your dream day? How do you handle a vendor who is inconsiderate or unhelpful when problems arise? Aleisha shares a pertinent story of how she handled a recent experience with poor customer service and gives tips for how couples can handle a similar situation when planning their wedding. 

Photo by George Coletrain 

I feel like art is something that everyone underestimates as gifts

Engagement gift ideas

When a couple gets engaged, typically the groom-to-be gives the bride-to-be a really nice, expensive ring as a symbol of their love and betrothal. Less common is for the bride-to-be to give her partner something in return. However, one Bridechilla wanted to do just that. What are some good gift ideas for your partner to celebrate your engagement. Hear Rich and Aleisha give some great ideas as they answer that and many other questions on this Wedding Q&A episode of the Bridechilla podcast.   

Listen to episode 388 of Bridechilla

Show Highlights

  • [0:43] Aleisha and Rich start the show by speaking in Spainish and talking about why Rich is joining today’s podcast

  • [4:14] Ellie asks for tips from the Bridechilla community for the one year countdown for her wedding. 

  • [8:36] How do you handle tipping vendors in Europe so that you show gratitude without offending?

  • [19:32] Bridechilla Kim asks how to deal with family who wants the partner to wear a dress when she doesn’t want to. 

  • [24:41] What do you do when you discover that your wedding venue has some issues that you don’t want to deal with? 

  • [31:04] Aleisha shares a story of bad customer service she experienced with a vendor and how she handled it.

  • [34:20] What would be a good gift to give your male partner as a way to celebrate your engagement.

  • [39:15] Rich and Aliesha give some ideas for gifts to give your fiance

  • [42:56] How can you submit a question for Aleisha and/or her guests to answer on the podcast

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

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387- Wedding Budget Busters

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

Jess Bishop, founder of The Budget Savvy Bride joins the Bridechilla podcast to talk about wedding budget busters with the Bridechilla community. We talk a lot about how important setting and sticking to a budget is when planning a wedding. Jess has dedicated her work to helping couples plan beautiful weddings without busting their budget. On this episode, Aleisha and Jess talk about some money saving ideas and weigh in on tips and advice other Bridechillas offer. If you are planning a wedding and are looking for some creative ways to save money, then be sure to listen to this podcast. 

Listen to episode 387 of Bridechilla

Like money in the bank

When saving money for your wedding, you want to make sure it is in a place where it will only be used for wedding expenses. You could hide the money under your mattress and hope you don’t forget about it. Or you could consider opening up a designated bank account specifically for wedding funds. Opening a bank account is easier than ever and with some banks can be done simply online. Having this account allows for people to make donations to your wedding fund and helps you keep up with your wedding budget. 

Photo by Blake Wisz​

If you know yourself and you know you can be responsible with paying those cards off every month, I think it’s a really great thing to take advantage of.

The perks of using credit cards

If are particularly disciplined and financially responsible, one way to help stay budget conscious and reap some extra benefits is by using credit cards. While you must be diligent to maintain your predetermined budget and pay the card off each month, credit cards can help you earn points or rewards that you can use for your honeymoon or after wedding travel. Jess and Aliesha share their experience with credit cards and how they have benefited from the perks during this conversation. 

Photo by Becca McHaffie

Getting thrifty at thrift stores

Bridechilla Mandy suggests one way to save money and get really great items for your wedding is to go thrift shopping. There are certain times or seasons where you can find fantastic decorations, arrangements, and even dresses at a fraction of the price. Thrifting is also a more sustainable way to shop for your wedding and allows for the reuse of wedding items that otherwise would likely only be used once. Hear about thrift shopping and other great ways to avoid wedding budget busters on this episode.

I think it’s really great to have a dedicated bank account for your wedding funds.

Avoiding budget busters with better ideas

Aleisha and Jess discuss several ideas that other Bridechillas submitted on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. From booking a venue that only requires a minimum spend without a rental fee, using the free cricket machine at the library to DIY crafts, and having a family member purchase your cake, there are a ton of helpful and creative tips during this podcast. If you want to plan a beautiful wedding without blowing your budget, then be sure to listen to this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

Sometimes it really does take sitting down and comparing things really closely

Photo by Matheus Ferrero

Listen to episode 387 of Bridechilla

Show Highlights

  • [0:14] Aleisha introduces this episodes guest who is a regular on the show, Jess Bishop, founder of The Budget Savvy Bride

  • [2:06] The pros and cons of setting up a designated bank account for your wedding funds

  • [4:15] Bridechilla Chelsea advises that couples use one particular credit card for wedding expenses and use the points for the honeymoon

  • [6:09] Jess and Aleisha discuss some of the perks of using particular credit cards

  • [9:33] Aleisha shares a story of her honeymoon and how a credit card perk got them an amazing hotel room

  • [11:49] Using a credit card responsibly can help your credit score and might provide purchase protection

  • [13:16] Bridechilla Mandy suggests hitting thrift stores after wedding season ends in your areas

  • [16:12] How do you get over the guilty feelings of asking your friends to spend money for a destination wedding?

  • [25:38] Jess talks about her book The Budget-Savvy Wedding Planner & Organizer.

  • [29:12] When serving guests at the wedding, start with the good wine, then switch to the cheaper kind

  • [32:42] You can save money by booking a venue that only charges a minimum spend with no rental fee

  • [35:03] Veronica talks about usings a cricket (paper cutter) at her local library to help save cost for certain wedding items

  • [39:03] Bridechilla Amanda gives a great piece of advice based on how she had a family member buy her wedding cake for her. 

Meet This Episode’s Guest

Jessica Bishop is the founder of The Budget Savvy Bride and author of the book The Budget-Savvy Wedding Planner & Organizer. Jessica is an expert at planning weddings on a budget and has helped couples all around the world plan the wedding they wanted at a cost they could afford. She has shared her tips with a multitude of publications and media outlets. She joins to Bridechilla show to share ways to plan a beautiful wedding without busting your budget.

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by taylor hernandez

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