Tag:

wedding Q&A

Bridechilla Blog

394- Q&A – Making Good Wedding Planning Decisions

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

Whether it’s trying to find the right dress, book the perfect venue, or plan the most beautiful ceremony, there are a lot of decisions to be made when planning your wedding. Often these decisions can lead to stress and anxiety. It doesn’t have to be this way. The Bridechilla podcast is here to help you stress less and enjoy the process of planning your wedding.
This episode Aleisha answers wedding planning questions about weekday weddings and guests leaving early, rehearsal dinner speeches and when to not invite family members who might be antagonistic or cause trouble on your wedding day.

Listen to episode 394 of Bridechilla

How to make a weekday wedding work

Madeline is a fellow Bridechilla and Australian who has a question about her venue. While most weddings are held on the weekend, is it possible to have a weekday wedding? What impact will that have on the guests that you want to come? There are certain advantages both with the venue and with vendors if you book your wedding on a weekday. There are also ways that you can make it a bit easier on your guests while still having the wedding you want. Hear Aleisha’s advice on making the unconventional but potentially beneficial decision of having a weekday wedding.

“I really support you in booking a weekday wedding. I know they are not as convenient as a weekend wedding for guests. However as a couple planning a wedding, and working with vendors, it could be a really good opportunity to score a venue that you really like that’s otherwise not available

Photo by Jonathan Borba 

A wedding before the wedding

Tradition is only as good as the people who intend to use it. If particular traditions don’t mean anything to you, then why use them? Bridechilla Katrina and her fiance are nontraditional and want to include that part of their personality in their wedding plans. She asks Aleisha about the idea of eloping prior to the big wedding ceremony. Rather than abandoning the event with their family and guests, they want to have a small private ceremony first. However, that doesn’t necessarily sit well with some family members. Aleisha shares her thoughts on how to best handle this nontraditional approach during this podcast. 

You can have the night off child care regardless of whose kids you are feeding...

What to do with the kids? 

Mariah is engaged to be engaged to her fiance who has kids of his own. During the wedding, she’d prefer not to be at a table with the kids. She doesn’t want to have to parent or have kid-inclusive conversations on a day that is all about her and her fiance. She asks for Aleisha’s opinion on this desire and for advice on how to best accomplish this without upsetting her fiance or other family members. Listen to this episode to hear Aleisha discuss this and other questions from the Bridechilla community.

Photo by Mikael Kristenson 

Facing feuding family members

The topic of family is one that comes up in almost every Q&A episode that we have on the Bridechilla podcast. Families can be supportive, helpful, and fantastic overall. Or they can be difficult, petty, and a living nightmare. Bridechilla Hannah has two family issues that she is having to deal with while planning her wedding. One involves honoring grandparents, while the other involves feuding brothers. Hear the details of this unique situation and what Aleisha has to say about it on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

Listen to episode 394 of Bridechilla

Show Highlights

  • [0:27] Aleisha introduces this episode of the podcast, which is the ever popular wedding planning Q&A episode.

  • [2:20] Madeline asks about the potential having a Thursday wedding and if people would be inclined to leave the reception early because it’s not on the weekend.

  • [6:18] Aleisha gives practical solutions for how to adjust your wedding plans to maintain the magic and make it more accommodating for guests

  • [8:17] Katrina and her fiance are untraditional and want Aleisha’s thoughts about eloping prior to the big wedding ceremony. 

  • [13:41] Mariah who is engaged to be engaged and asks about seating arrangements and what to do about her husband-to-be’s kids at the wedding.  

  • [22:54] Gina asks for guidance regarding speeches for both the rehearsal dinner and wedding day for their intimate wedding in Greece. 

  • [27:00] Bridechilla Hannah asks questions about dealing with family issues while planning her wedding. She talks about her grandparents and estranged uncles. 

  • [31:33] The wedding is all about you and your comfort level. Aleisha gives advice for dealing with volatile family members. 

  • [33:07] Don’t forget, the Bridechilla pack with the two books that Aleisha has produced is available. 

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

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392- Q&A- How to Feel Better About Yourself While Planning Your Wedding

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

Whether you are planning a wedding or just going through something stressful, it is nice to hear that other people are dealing with similar issues. Sometimes you hear about other people’s problems and it makes you feel better. Helping you get through the wedding planning process is what we are all about on the Bridechilla podcast. That’s why we are sharing problems and questions from the Bridechilla community. On this episode, Aleisha addresses questions about assigning roles and responsibilities to your wedding party, abandoning the first look, and how to know how many invitees will actually be at the wedding.

Listen to episode 392 of Bridechilla

Pick and choose your traditions

When planning your wedding, you might decide there are certain traditions that you don’t want to adhere to. Is it crazy to have a non-traditional wedding. There are many wedding traditions that you might choose to include in your ceremony. However, many customs might not make sense or be meaningful to you. Your wedding is about you, so you can choose to do whatever you want. Bridechilla Kelly doesn’t want just a traditional maid-of-honor. She wants three. Hear Aleisha’s advice for how to define roles for the three maids and how to make this unique arrangement work. 

Photo by Miguel Ángel Hernández

No matter what label we are putting on people we are asking to help, the big thing is having a discussion with them about their expectations and your expectations.

Skip the secrets

Another tradition that a lot of couples choose to do is to keep the bride’s dress a secret until the day of the wedding. They often do a “first-look” prior to the wedding and photographs. However, one bridechilla contacted Aleisha to ask what they should do if they don’t want to participate in a first look. In fact, they don’t want to keep the dress a secret at all. There is no right or wrong way to customize your wedding. Hear what Aleisha’s thoughts about skipping the dress secret and abandoning the first look.  

Plan to pause with your partner

Another way to feel better about yourself when planning your wedding is to plan for quiet moments for you and your partner during the wedding day. There is so much going on during the day, it is easy to reach the end and not remember anything. Though you want your guests to have a good time, the wedding is really about you and your partner. Aleisha encourages finding moments during the day to just pause together, reflect, and ensure that your day is truly memorable.

Photo by Jonathan Borba 

Find a place for the parents

You might think you are juggling a lot of people and relationships for your wedding. But do you have 7 parents to include in your wedding? That’s exactly how many Bridechilla Kristen has. Kristen wants to know how to include all of the parents and step parents in meaningful ways while still keeping the wedding special and according to her wishes. Hear Aleisha’s answer to that and many other questions during this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

Look at the day and don’t feel an obligation when it comes to having to appease all these people. That goes for everyone really

Listen to the episode

Show Highlights

  • [0:30] After looking at her inbox, Aleisha decided that another wedding planning Q&A episode was in order.

  • [2:16] Bridechilla Stephanie wants to know a special and creative way to ask a long-distance friend to be a part of her wedding.

  • [6:11] Kelly asks for ideas for how to have three maids-of-honors and how to make each one feel special. 

  • [10:10] Is it crazy to not want to keep your dress a secret for the first look? 

  • [12:32] Courtney calls to get Aleisha’s advice on how to plan for how many people on the guest list will actually attend.

  • [22:40] Get the hardback wedding planning guide written by Aleisha at Bridechillstore.com.

  • [24:02] Kristen is getting married in July and wants to know how to deal with having 7 parents in their wedding and how to assign roles. 

  • [29:41] Aleisha invites the Bridechilla community to continue submitting questions, as there are more Q&A episodes to come.

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

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391- Wedding Planning Q&A Jennifer Charles and Kimberly Allen

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

The wedding planning process is all about creating your wedding memories before the big day happens. Jennifer Charles and Kimberly Allen of Something Fabulous join the Bridechilla podcast to answer questions and help you think about planning your wedding with the end in mind. Since 2002, they have been helping couples and corporations design unique events that focus on the why, not just the how. During this episode, they answer questions from the Bridechilla community about destination weddings, how to maintain your vision during the wedding process, and how to deal with difficult family relationships. 

Listen to episode 391 of Bridechilla

How well-suited are you for a destination wedding?

Planning a wedding requires a lot of organization and attention to detail. A destination wedding requires a completely different approach to planning. Kate asks how to handle the grooms tux for her destination wedding. Should they purchase the suit prior to leaving and travel with it, or try to get a suit at the location of the wedding? These types of issues should be considered during the planning process to ensure a smooth experience. Hear Jennifer’s and Kimberly’s thoughts about this question and much more. 

What is the memory you are trying to make and how do you want to feel about your wedding when all is said and done?”

Creating one last wedding memory

For many couples, the most important part of the wedding is the people attending. One Bridechilla shares her concern with a family member who is extremely sick and might not live to see their wedding. She and her spouse-to-be are considering holding a special pre-wedding ceremony just so they can have a memorable experience with their family member before they pass. Jennifer and Kimberly share some ideas for how they can create a special wedding memory during this difficult time.

On your wedding day, you should not be worrying about your decor and what table number goes where

Maintain your wedding vision

Because there are so many decisions and so many options, the vision you have for your wedding can easily be compromised. In a month, or ten years when you look back at your wedding experience, you want to be sure that you created the wedding memories you wanted. Whether it be dealing with overly-involved family members or difficult memories, Jennifer and Kimberly have some great tips for how to maintain the vision for your wedding throughout the planning process. 

Photo by Bekir Temel

If you are acting out of love and respect, you can’t be wrong. It’s your day!

Planning with love and respect

Jennifer and Kimberly have a philosophy of wedding planning that works for everyone. Their professional background and extensive experience has helped refine their approach to creating wedding memories. As long as you start with the end in mind, treat everyone with love and respect, and let the logistics serve your vision, your wedding can be the unique and authentic event you dream it to be. Listen to stories from their experience and learn from their expertise on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast.

Show Highlights

  • [0:50] Introduction of this episode’s guests, Jennifer and Kimberly from Something Fabulous Events. 

  • [2:56] Jennifer and Kimberly share their backgrounds, how they started Something Fabulous and how their backgrounds help them do what they do. 

  • [ 7:07] Bridechilla Kate asks about how to handle purchasing suits for a destination wedding.

  • [12:54] Aleisha, Kimberly and Jennifer answer a question about family submitted by an anonymous bridechilla. 

  • [24:15] How do you maintain your vision throughout the wedding planning process?

  • [30:46] Your personal style never goes out of style.

  • [35:50] How can you do a room flip for a reception at your wedding venue?

  • [38:19] Using a coordinator or a professional to help during the day and how they can help take care of room flip logistics. 

  • [41:55] You can have your way while still maintaining an attitude of love and respect. 

  • [45:00] How to get in touch with Jennifer and Kimberly

 

Listen to episode 391 of Bridechilla

Meet This Episode’s Guests

Jennifer and Kimberly are sisters and the founders of Something Fabulous, which is an event and wedding planning management service. They started designing experiences together in 2002 and have now done thousands of events. Their goal is to help individuals create a truly unique and one-of-a-kind event that tells an authentic story. They have an award winning team who can help create a beautiful event from start to finish. 

Show image by Bekir Temel

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

http://www.swankybadger.com
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388- Wedding Planning Q&A, with Rich

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

On this episode of the Bridechilla podcast, Aleisha’s husband Rich joins the show to answer wedding questions from the Bridechilla community. Being a part of the Bridechilla community gives you access not only to Aliesha’s knowledge and insight about planning a wedding, but also a great support system of men and women who are going through a similar journey as you. During this podcast, you’ll hear questions about appropriate tipping for a European wedding, how to deal with bad customer service from a wedding venue, and engagement gift ideas for the groom.

Listen to episode 388 of Bridechilla

A wedding day is about wearing things that make you feel comfortable and fabulous.

One year countdown

The engagement period is full of excitement. You are looking forward to a great celebration and a wonderful, meaningful marriage thereafter. There can also be a lot of stress. There are so many plans to be made, vendors to book, and guests to invite. Depending on the length of your engagement, you will have to be strategic in how you prioritize your time and finances. Ellie writes in asking for Aleisha’s advice about how to go about prioritizing her planning with one year left before the wedding day.

Photo by Alvin Mahmudov

Tips on tipping

In America, it is customary to tip generously. It is a way of showing gratitude for excellent service. However, if you are planning a destination wedding in another country, you should be sure to consider their customs. Acting like an American in other countries can often be seen as rude or pretentious. Aleisha discusses the tipping customs specifically in Italy and encourages listeners to be savvy when visiting other countries. Rather than risking the chance of offending your foreign hosts, take some time to research and understand their traditions and then follow suit. Here all about that and many more Wedding Q&As on this podcast.

The last 6 months of wedding planning really flies and that’s when things happen that you might not be ready for. Even when you are really organized you still have to be a bit ninja.Enter your text here...

Putting the service back into customer service

When planning your wedding, it is important to first know what you and your partner want. Once you are in agreement, and you have set a prioritized budget, then the goal is to make your dream a reality. So what do you do when poor customer service threatens to get in the way of your dream day? How do you handle a vendor who is inconsiderate or unhelpful when problems arise? Aleisha shares a pertinent story of how she handled a recent experience with poor customer service and gives tips for how couples can handle a similar situation when planning their wedding. 

Photo by George Coletrain 

I feel like art is something that everyone underestimates as gifts

Engagement gift ideas

When a couple gets engaged, typically the groom-to-be gives the bride-to-be a really nice, expensive ring as a symbol of their love and betrothal. Less common is for the bride-to-be to give her partner something in return. However, one Bridechilla wanted to do just that. What are some good gift ideas for your partner to celebrate your engagement. Hear Rich and Aleisha give some great ideas as they answer that and many other questions on this Wedding Q&A episode of the Bridechilla podcast.   

Listen to episode 388 of Bridechilla

Show Highlights

  • [0:43] Aleisha and Rich start the show by speaking in Spainish and talking about why Rich is joining today’s podcast

  • [4:14] Ellie asks for tips from the Bridechilla community for the one year countdown for her wedding. 

  • [8:36] How do you handle tipping vendors in Europe so that you show gratitude without offending?

  • [19:32] Bridechilla Kim asks how to deal with family who wants the partner to wear a dress when she doesn’t want to. 

  • [24:41] What do you do when you discover that your wedding venue has some issues that you don’t want to deal with? 

  • [31:04] Aleisha shares a story of bad customer service she experienced with a vendor and how she handled it.

  • [34:20] What would be a good gift to give your male partner as a way to celebrate your engagement.

  • [39:15] Rich and Aliesha give some ideas for gifts to give your fiance

  • [42:56] How can you submit a question for Aleisha and/or her guests to answer on the podcast

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

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Show image by insung yoon

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385- Wedding Photography Q&A with Cavin Elizabeth

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

Weeks, months or even years down the road, you will likely want to look back and remember the great memories made during your wedding. You’ll want to relive that special day and see the people and places that made your wedding so great. Which is why it is so important to have great pictures taken at your wedding. On this episode of the Bridechilla podcast, Cavin Elizabeth, international wedding photographer and author of the book A Bride’s Guide to a Picture Perfect Wedding, joins the show for wedding photography Q&A. During this conversation, Cavin gives advice about how to plan for hair and makeup, the best time of day to have your wedding, and how to have the best possible experience with your wedding photographer.

Listen to episode 385 of Bridechilla

The first look and the best look

There are several options for when to take pictures at your wedding. The more traditional approach is to take pictures after the wedding so the couple doesn’t see each other beforehand. Increasingly more common is what is called the first look, where the couple has a private time before the ceremony to see each other and have some pictures taken. Whichever way you decide to do it, it is important that you have a plan in place for getting pictures taken in a way that doesn’t interfere with your ability to interact with your guests and enjoy the event. Cavin and Aleisha discuss some best practices for planning your photography during this wedding photography Q&A episode.

Always trust your photographer. If they are giving you advice on something in their experience, they are trying to keep your best interest at heart, even if it might not be what you want to hear

Dos and don'ts for working with a wedding photographer

Taking pictures can often be uncomfortable for people. Especially at a wedding, taking a lot of pictures may not always feel natural. How can you have the best possible experience with your photographer so that everyone feels comfortable and your pictures turn out beautiful. Cavin shares some advice for how to cultivate a great relationship with your photographer even before the wedding day. She also talks about some dos and don’ts that can help your wedding pictures turn out amazing. 

How to get picture perfect hair and makeup

For brides, one of the biggest parts of the lead up to the wedding ceremony is hair and makeup. Hours before the event you have to have your hair professionally styled and your makeup applied by an expert. When it comes to pictures, what is the best practice for looking your best? Cavin explains that while the camera can do beautiful things, it can also do funny things, like diminish the look or amount of makeup you are wearing. She talks about the best approach to hair and makeup and how to find the right vendor that fits your style. 

The bride and groom did not see each other before the ceremony because it was always an arranged marriage and they didn’t want to groom fleeing the scene at the sight of the bride.

Great lighting for great wedding pictures

Great photos depend on great lighting. How can you achieve great lighting when you are in a dimly lit venue or when you are outside? A good photographer will handle the lighting scenarios and will position the people in the picture appropriately to capture the best images. Cavin talks about the importance of picking the right time of day for an outdoor wedding, and even reveals the absolute best time to plan your wedding so you will have gorgeous photos. Hear all about that and much more on this wedding photography Q&A episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

Show Highlights

  • [0:29] Aleisha introduces this week’s guest, Cavin Elizabeth, international wedding film and photographer and author of A Bride’s Guide to a Picture Perfect Wedding

  • [3:25] Cavin and Aleisha talk about Cavin’s unique wedding dress

  • [6:28] Bridechilla Justine and her partner aren’t doing a “first-look”. How can they get all their photos done during cocktail hour without running into the reception.

  • [10:25] Cavin gives suggestions for how to speed up the post-wedding photography by getting other shots separately or at other times  

  • [13:26] Why are groomchillas typically against the first look? 

  • [15:37] Nicole wants to know some dos and don’ts about how to get the best possible wedding day photos

  • [26:06] Cavin talks about the importance of hair and makeup to have the best possible photos

  • [29:25] Aleisha shares her makeup experience working in the television industry

  • [32:22] There are different types of makeup artists - find one that fits your style 

  • [36:21] Think about your timeline and when do have hair and makeup done when considering prep time for pictures

  • [37:11] Cavin discuss the importance of lighting and how the photographer will handle that 

  • [42:32} How you can book Cavin to take your photographs

The harsh reality of stuff in weddings often is that everything is a give-and-take.

Listen to the episode

Meet This Episode’s Guest

Cavin Elizabeth is an international wedding film and digital photographer based in San Diego. She operates a boutique studio with a focus on personal connection that makes couples more at ease while being photographed for their special day. This gives Cavin’s picture a natural, authentic and romantic look. She also wrote a book entitled A Bride’s Guide to a Picture Perfect Wedding that teaches brides how to get the most out of their wedding photography and have magazine worthy images.

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

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All images by Cavin Elizabeth Photography 

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381- Wedding Planning Q&A with Aleisha

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

When you are in the middle of wedding planning, it’s easy to think you are the only one who struggles or has issues. The wedding industry likes to portray weddings as magical, perfect events. Here on the bridechilla podcast, we know that isn’t always the case. That’s why we have wedding planning question and answer episodes; so that you can hear from other Bridechillas who are struggling along the wedding planning journey and get some great advice on how to deal with specific problems. On this episode, you’ll hear questions about involving your parents and step parents in the wedding planning process, how to handle friends who are also wedding vendors, and how to be involved in the planning of your own bachelorette or hen party. 

Listen to episode 380 Of The Bridechilla Podcast

Requesting wedding gifts, the right way

One perk of getting married is that people will give you gifts. Registries can help guide attendees in buying you the things you want and need. What do you do if there are differing gift traditions with you and your partner? How can you communicate both wishes to your wedding guests without seeming pretentious or ungrateful? There is a way to clearly and tactfully explain the best approach to gifts at your wedding. Aleisha explains how and stresses that the key is expressing gratitude. Hear about that and much more on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. 

A lot of the time people feel disconnected from the process or they feel left out or lonely about it all because they don’t know what’s going on.

3 Ways to Involve a long-distance parent in your wedding

When planning a wedding, a bride might find herself a long distance away from home. How do you get your parents involved in the planning process when they are in different states, countries, or time zones? Sometimes, all it takes is just keeping them updated with progress. Aleisha gives three specific ways to make a parent or close relative feel a part of the process even when they aren’t nearby. A little planning and some extra attention can help close the gap and ease the tension with parents who want to be involved but can’t because of distance.  

Photo by Analise Benevides 

How to involve your stepparent in the wedding

Bridechilla Kristen asks how she should involve her step dad in the wedding. Her parents will be walking her down the aisle, but she still wants to include her step dad. With a limited number of roles in most weddings, how do you include everyone who is important to you in the wedding? Aleisha recommends some unique ways to involve step parents or other relatives in the ceremony that will allow you to honor them and will allow them to be a meaningful part of your wedding. 

Older people sometimes say ‘That is what we do and we are not going to change it just because they wrote it on a website.

Friends with wedding benefits...frendors

Some brides love the idea of having a bridesmaid or friend fix their hair, shoot their pictures, or cater their wedding. It can be a huge cost savings and can ensure that you have a trusting relationship with that person. However, hiring or using a friends gift or talent for your wedding might not always be desirable. It could cause unnecessary tension in the relationship. And you may want that friend to come and enjoy the wedding rather than work at it. How can you communicate your feelings and wishes to a friend who might be expecting to be asked to work your wedding? Aleisha gives tips for thoughtfully sharing with your friend so as to maintain the relationship and hire the vendor you want. 

I believe you should always offer to pay people and allow them to say ‘no, no I’d love to gift you your wedding hair.

Photo by Fa Barboza

That is the worst thing you can do to anyone that is angry or feeling stressed or overwhelmed is to go ‘just calm down.’ That’s my trigger point of going ‘I’m going to punch you in the throat'. Don’t tell me to calm down.

Listen to episode 380 of the Bridechilla Podcast

Show Highlights

  • [0:26] Introduction of this week’s show and how Aleisha has been able to produce so many podcast episodes. 

  • [1:15] Aleisha explains what wedstress is and how the bridechilla podcast is here to help alleviate your wedstress.

  • [3:59] Bridechilla Rosie asks What is the clear, tactful way of telling wedding guests that there are two ways to give wedding gifts when there are two different customs involved. 

  • [7:08] Kennedy is concerned that her mom is feeling left out of the wedding planning since she and her fiance live away from home. How can she make her feel more involved?

  • [11:23] Kennedy also asks how to handle a bridesmaid who has tattoos that her partner and future Mother-in-law are afraid will be a bad look for the wedding and pictures. 

  • [14:36] Kristen from Canada wants to know how to involve her stepdad in her wedding. 

  • [22:29] How to address friends who are expecting to be hired to help with your wedding when you’d rather just have them attend or being a part of the wedding party. 

  • [27:27] Destination bachelorette parties.

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With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by Olivia Bauso 

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379- Bridechilla Wedding Planning Q&A

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

In this Bridechilla Q&A episode Aleisha answers wedding (and life) questions from the Bridechilla community including- managing social anxiety when it comes to wedding events and meeting new people, the unpredictable nature of mental illness- finding a balance between being supportive and doing what is right for you and planning extra wedding events , when you don't want them but your family is insisting on throwing you a bunch of extra parties! All that and more on the Bridechilla Podcast!

Listen to episode 379 of Bridechilla

Social Anxiety and Weddings

The overwhelm of wedding planning and the events leading up to wedding celebrations, can be challenging for anyone or people but for people who suffer from social anxiety, everyday social interactions can cause anxiety and the stress of these situations can feel like they are too much to handle. In this episode Aleisha answers a question from a Bridechilla listener who was surprised by feeling overwhelmed and feeling in desperate need of personal space after spending a weekend away with her future in-laws and is worried that she will feel the same anxiousness at her wedding events. Tune in for Aleisha's advice on how to cope and hear her story of being an introverted extrovert and how she copes. 
Aleisha mentions a previous episode of the Bridechilla Podcast about mindfulness, which will be helpful for anyone having similar feelings. You can listen here. 

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 

What does a Wedding MC do?

A chilla asks, what is the role of a wedding MC?'.
Wedding receptions often have a Master of Ceremonies (MC) to keep the day running smoothly. The master of ceremonies introduces speakers, makes announcements, and engages with the audience to keep the ceremony agenda flowing as smoothly as possible.
Who takes on the role of an MC depends on where you live. In Australia, where Bridechilla founder Aleisha is from, traditionally you ask a family member or friend to take on the role of the MC. In the USA, it is often the wedding DJ who keeps things moving. In the UK, you can hire professional MCs. Whoever you choose, you want to ensure that they are confident and can keep the show on the road. 
The role of MC is simple. It requires you to make a few announcements loudly and clearly as the day progresses.For more tips about being prepared for the role of MC and also how to ready yourself to make a speech, don't miss this episode of the Bridechilla Podcast.  

Photo by Casey Chae 

To Bridal Shower, or to not Bridal Shower?

Bridechilla focuses a lot on helping couples decide what traditions are meaningful to them and then encourages the remainder to be thrown in the fuck it bucket. As Aleisha acknowledges this episode, there are sometimes moments in wedding planning where you may come to a compromise with family members to keep the peace or at the very least find a way to keep some traditions that are important to parents but do them in a way that suits you.
Bridal shower for many Chillas can sometimes be seen as a rather patriarchal event. Historically it was  a gift-giving party held for a bride-to-be in anticipation of her wedding, where guests would bring gifts for the home (often 'kitchen' themed). In this episode, Aleisha answers a question from a Bridechilla, asking about how to change up that tradition, avoid getting a bunch of stuff that may not be used and instead register for gifts and experiences that you as a couple would enjoy.
One of Aleisha's suggestions is an alcohol registry care of our partners Thirsty Nest.  

play

Listen to episode 379 of Bridechilla

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by  Dmitry Bayer 

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375- Wedding Traditions, Dresses, and Parents Q&A with Aleisha

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

In this episode, you’ll hear questions from the Bridechilla community about how to handle the wedding dress being ruined three weeks before the ceremony, how to deal with parents overstepping boundaries, and a great story about a ditching wedding traditions and going your own way. Listen for the great advice that can help you with similar issues when planning your wedding

Listen to episode 375 of The Bridechilla Podcast

Creating new wedding traditions when the old ones don’t apply

The Bridechilla community knows that traditions can be taken or left. No tradition is more important that the wishes and desires of the couple getting married. Erin is the quintessential Bridechilla who is not only rejecting old, irrelevant traditions, but is also creating new and unique traditions. Some of her plans had to be altered due to the fact that her Mom and Dad have passed away. She has found creative ways to honor them while having a customized wedding that is sure to be special. Listen as Erin gives an update about her wedding plans.

If you can attach a meaning to a tradition, then do it. But if you can’t, then ditch it

What to do when they messed up the dress

Bridechilla Kate has a huge dress dilemma. Alterations ruined her dress and she only has three weeks until the wedding. As you can imagine she is stressed out and unsure of what to do. She wants to wear a dress that she looks and feels great in but is afraid that finding another one in such a short amount of time might be impossible. Aleisha gives Kate advice about how to find another dress quickly and what recourse she has with the vendor who messed up the dress.

Lady wearing white wedding dress walking

Photo by Melody Jacob

If you are going into a situation potentially with a vendor that isn’t offering you a contract then it’s not great

Get it right, get it in writing

If you are in the midst of hiring vendors now or have had issues with vendors before, this is an episode you don’t want to miss. While answering the question about the ruined dress, Aleisha recalls a previous episode of the Bridechilla podcast with a guest who is a wedding lawyer. She recaps some of the great information discussed on that episode. When dealing with vendors, it is critical to get things in writing. Vendors should provide written contracts, but if they don’t you can create one. Listen to this episode to hear Aleisha’s advice about how to make sure you are treated fairly and get the service you deserve.

We can’t make our parents. They made us. But that doesn’t mean that we as children have to go along with all the shit that they sometimes pull

Photo by Alasdair Elmes 

Wedding planning with parents

Involving parents in your wedding planning can be both a blessing and a curse. While they can be a source of support and encouragement, they can also be opinionated or demanding. Everyone’s relationship with their parents is different. Bridechilla Claire asks how to deal with her dad who is not respecting her wishes for her wedding. How do you handle a parent who is imposing his will on the wedding? Aleisha suggests that, because you know your relatives and parents well, you can judge whether or not they will behave on the wedding day or if the should be left out of the ceremony. She also encourages Bridechillas to consider the parent’s perspective as well and how they have probably dreamed about your wedding for longer than you have. She gives advice for how to acknowledge that reality while still maintaining your plans. Hear all about that and much more on the Bridechilla podcast.

Show Highlights

  • [0:27] Introduction of the Bridechilla podcast, this question and answer episode episode and the upcoming 5 year anniversary.

  • [3:18] Aleisha thanks everyone for their reviews and tells where you can purchase Bridechilla items. She also explains how you can submit questions for Q&A episodes

  • [4:28] Bridechilla Erin talks about how she and her fiance are planning their nontraditional wedding and how they are going to handle not having her parents at the wedding

  • [6:44] Erin tells a story about a wedding she was at recently where a groom got really drunk and, during the garter toss, spent a really long time under the brides dress.

  • [9:41] Kate asks an urgent question about her wedding dress that was ruined by alterations three weeks prior to her wedding day.

  • [11:32] Aliesha gives advice for how to handle a vendor when they don’t fulfill their obligation for the wedding.

  • [13:16] What to do if you are dealing with a vendor that isn’t giving you a contract.

  • [26:27] How to deal with a parent who is making the wedding day about him and not respecting the brides wishes.

Listen to episode 375 of The Bridechilla Podcast

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by  Mark Zamora

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374- Wedding Planning Q&A with Michelle Durpetti

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

On this episode of the Bridechilla podcast,  Michelle Durpetti joins Aleisha to answer questions about planning a wedding submitted by the Bridechilla community. Michelle has produced over 350 weddings and events and brings a wealth of knowledge about how to plan the wedding you want. During this episode she shares her perspective on the timeline and agenda of a wedding, how to communicate clearly to those involved or attending the wedding, and answers several other questions. The questions submitted by the Bridechilla community are always incredibly thoughtful and helpful to other brides in the planning stages of their wedding, so be sure to listen and learn during this podcast. 

Listen to the episode

How to create a great wedding schedule

Any event has a schedule or agenda that it follows. This allows anyone that is a part of that event to plan and prepare. It also sets expectations of the attendees. A wedding is no different. There is a structure and agenda that is followed so that everything the bride and groom have dreamed of can be accomplished. During this conversation, Michelle shares how she approaches creating a schedule for a wedding and the benefits of a well-thought out plan. Michelle says, “The timeline isn’t only the thing that you adhere to while you are in the day, it is also becomes a checklist leading into it to make sure all your I’s are dotted and your T’s are crossed.”

The timeline isn’t only the thing that you adhere to while you are in the day, it is also becomes a checklist leading into it to make sure all your I’s are dotted and your T’s are crossed

Destination wedding planning for the travel-averse

Planning a destination wedding can be so exciting. Bridechilla Chelsea is having a destination wedding in France that sounds absolutely wonderful. She asks for advice on how to make her travel averse parents and other guest feel welcome and comfortable during their time in a foreign country. She also asks how she can help break the ice and facilitate connection between guests who don’t know each other. Michelle gives advice for creating a welcome package for the guests that will help them enjoy their time and their surroundings. She also shares ideas for icebreakers and mixers prior to the wedding.  

Photo by Alireza Dolati 

At the end of the day, they aren’t really opposed to [a nontraditional wedding] so much as they don’t understand it.

Navigating the difficulty of financial assistance with strings attached

Getting married can be expensive and paying for the wedding can be difficult. It’s nice to have parents or relatives who are willing to contribute financially. But what do you do when those donors start sharing their opinions about the ceremony? And what if those opinions don’t reflect the kind of wedding you and your partner would like to have? It’s a tricky dilemma but not one that should ruin your day. Michelle talks about communicating clearly with donors and also considering ways to compromise so that the people you love are able to fully celebrate on your wedding day. Hear her advice on this and much more during this podcast.

If your choice is to celebrate your marriage at 11 o’clock in the morning and you want to dance and 2 o’clock to celebrate that, then by all means dance

How to enhance a midday wedding celebration

There is no such thing as the wedding police. And there is no right or wrong way to get married. It is important for couples to plan the kind of wedding they want to have regardless of what traditions or customs might be imposed in their culture. Bridechilla Jaime asks about planning an 11:00am wedding and how that might affect both the scheduling of the day and the party-like atmosphere that she still hopes to create. Regardless of the time of day, you can create the kind of atmosphere you desire with proper planning, communication, and maybe a little booze. Listen as Michelle answers this and other questions during this episode of the Bridechilla podcast.

bride wearing a hat and carrying a bouquet

Photo by Adrianna Van Groningen

There really is no such thing as far as I know anywhere in the world as the wedding police!

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Show Highlights

  • [0:37] Introduction of the episode and guest Michelle Durpett, a wedding and event planner from Chicago.

  • [4:00] Michelle shares what she learned from doing corporate events that she has applied to planning weddings.

  • [7:10] Tips for developing and sticking to the timeline for your wedding, and how the timeline helps both on the day of the wedding and prior to the day.

  • [11:45] Bridechilla Chelsea asks about tips for hospitality for a destination wedding in France.

  • [16:47] How to talk with parents who have donated to the wedding and are fighting against a less-traditional wedding

  • [26:22] Jaime is having a lunchtime wedding and wants to know about what kind of timeline plans she should consider with such an early wedding.

  • [33:16] Sydney asks about save-the-dates to people she’s inviting to the reception but not the ceremony.

  • [37:20] Michelle shares how brides can get in touch with her and potentially hire her to plan their wedding.   

Listen to the episode

Meet Michelle Durpetti

Since the inception of  Michelle Durpetti Events  in 2008, Michelle has planned and produced over 300 weddings and events including some of Chicago’s most notable, celeb-studded events such as the Chicago Gateway Green’s annual Green Tie Ball, the Fiera Italiana, in conjunction with the annual Columbus Day Parade, for the Joint Civic Committee of Italian Americans, and the Chicago Hunter Derby. Michelle was recently named one of the Top 50 Planners in the country by Partyslate and has been featured both nationally and locally by publications such as Inside Weddings, Style Me Pretty, Grace Ormonde, Modern Luxury Weddings, Strictly Weddings, Today's Chicago Woman Magazine and more.At almost the ten year marker with MDE, Michelle still

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by Morgan McDonald 

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372- Bridechilla Wedding Planning Q&A

by Aleisha
written by Aleisha

If you have questions about planning your wedding and are looking for some great advice and a lot of fun, then be sure to listen to this episode of the Bridechilla podcast. Aleisha catches up on her voicemail by answering questions left by members of the bridechilla community. The Bridechilla podcast doesn’t just talk about flower colors or types of dresses. We talk about the serious, sometimes difficult side of planning a wedding that can affect real life and close relationships. During this podcast, Aleisha addresses the issue of taking your partner’s last name, breaking off an engagement, dealing with a double-booked venue and even how to handle citizenship issues when planning your wedding.

Listen to episode 372 of Bridechilla

Bride and groom posing next to a combi van

Photo by Jessica Rockowitz

HI, my name is...

The Bridechilla community knows that no tradition should be blindly accepted. If the tradition serves a purpose in your wedding, then by all means use it. But there is no obligation to follow particular customs without consideration or reasoning. One such tradition is taking your partner’s last name. Bridechilla Kelsey is not taking her partner’s last name and wants to know how to deal with family members and friends who assume that she is. Aleisha also helps Kelsey and the Bridechilla community consider how to handle the family name for when they have children.

We are in a time where we have so many options, there is flexibility. It is not taboo to not take your partner’s name when it comes to getting hitched.

Do you double down if they double book?

Brianna called Aleisha to find out what to do about her wedding venue. After booking two rooms at the same venue for both the ceremony and reception and paying a downpayment, Brianna received word that the venue had double booked and wants to cancel one of the rooms. To complicate matters, Brianna and her fiance both work at the venue. During this question and answer, Aleisha gives advice for how to deal with conflict and how to handle complications when planning your wedding.

Bride on the beach

Photo by Anna Utochkina 

There is no shame in moving on

Before marrying Rich, Aleisha was engaged to another man. To cope with calling off the first wedding, Aleisha did a stand up comedy routine that ultimately led to the start of Bridechilla. When Bridechillas Tori and Rach both have questions about how to move on with their wedding planning after having ended a previous engagement to another man, Aleisha is able to give first-hand advice. There can be shame and guilt that accompanies difficult breakups. Nothing should keep you from moving on and finding happiness in another relationship.

I think we need to embrace these ups and downs and not feel the shame attached to them because that doesn’t get you anywhere.

Finding happiness in your wedding planning

The goal of wedding planning is to decide what you want and what makes you happy and then do it. Wedding planning can reveal a lot about your life and priorities. While planning her wedding, El discovered that she is missing close relationships with friends. She is struggling to decide who to invite to be her bridesmaids and asks Aleisha for advice. Listen as Aleisha encourages El and reminds the Bridechilla community of how comparison can rob you of satisfaction in your own wedding. Hear all that and much more on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast.

bride wearing a veil

Photo by Rachel Lees

Instead of feeling bad that this is being tainted in some sort of way, see it as a really positive step and a huge milestone in your relationship

Listen to episode 372 of Bridechilla

Show Highlights

  • [1:10] Aleisha introduces this episode, during which she answers questions left on voicemail from the bridechilla community.

  • [3:32] Kelsy’s question is about how to nicely deal with people who criticize her for not taking her partner’s last name. Also how to handle a family name when children come along.

  • [9:04] Bridechilla Becca calls to say thank you to Aleisha for giving her the courage to make the decisions that she wants for her wedding

  • [10:13] Brianna’s venue (which she actually works at) double-booked and is asking them to make a change that they don’t want to. What should she do?

  • [20:57] New-to-Bridechilla Tori wants to know how to announce her engagement after having broken off an unhealthy prior engagement to another guy.  

  • [27:18] Rach wants to know whether she should invite her Mother to her wedding after a rocky relationship.

  • [34:10] El from New Jersey, realized through wedding planning that she doesn’t have the close relationships she wishes she had and wants advice on what to do?

  • [37:28] Laura wants to know how to plan a low-key courthouse wedding prior to their big ceremony in order to help with her Canadian fiance’s citizenship status.

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

Show image by Jonathan Borba 

The Bridechilla Wedding Planning Guides
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