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Bridechilla Wedding Planning

Helping You Ditch Wedding Stress And Plan The Wedding You Want

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wedding reception

Bridechilla BlogBridechilla Podcast

348- Wedding Speeches and public speaking

by Aleisha November 26, 2018
written by Aleisha

If you are planning to make a speech at your wedding, hire an MC (or ask a friend or family member to host)or you just want to become more confident at public speaking and making presentations at work, this episode of Bridechilla is wonderful for you! Aleisha chats to her friend Julia Zemiro and MC Samantha Savoia. I know you'll find value and laughs in this episode and feel like jumping up on stage with a microphone by the end!

Listen to episode 348 of Bridechilla

Why you need a MC at your wedding

A Master of Ceremonies can make the wedding day a smoother, better experience. The MC is there to help keep the agenda moving as planned. They also help to set the tone of the day. To have the best experience, it is important for the couple or the wedding planner to communicate clearly so that the MC knows the timeline of events for the day. Providing the critical information can help your MC do their job better. Listen as Aleisha talks to two pros who give valuable insight on what makes a great MC.

How to be a great MC

Samantha Savoia is a professional MC from Toronto, Canada. She contacted Aliesha with some great ideas about how to hire a great MC from her expertise and experience. Samantha says that ultimately the MC is there to keep the party going. By interacting with the crowd, leading in games, and getting people on the dance floor, the MC is the one who can really elevate the celebration. Samantha also gives great tips for wedding speeches and wedding planning during this interview.

Rich and Aleisha Co-hosting our friends, Hannah and Phil's wedding

Tips for giving a great wedding speech

Many people are afraid of public speaking. Unless it is something you do often, speaking in front of a crowd can be intimidating. How can you ensure that you give a great wedding speech? Julia Zemiro says that confidence is key. And the best way to feel confident is through preparation. She encourages anyone giving a speech to write down their thoughts then read them out loud. She also says that there is no pressure to be funny. Just be authentic. Hear more of Julia’s tips on this episode of the Bridechilla podcast.

How to seduce and cajole a crowd

Along with great tips for delivering a meaningful and memorable wedding speech, Aleisha’s guests share the importance of knowing and interacting with a crowd. Whether you are the MC or just one of several giving a speech, you must consider the audience. Make sure you don’t embarrass the couple. Celebrate and honor them. You also need to be able to read the room. Understand what is appropriate and what is out of bounds. And funny is great, but sentimental is even better. Let the Bridechilla podcast help you give better wedding speeches.

Photo by Alasdair Elmes

Show Highlights

  • [1:35] Introduction of this podcast’s topic, public speaking, and the two guest interviews
  • [3:58] Aliesha’s connection to her first guest, Julia Zemiro
  • [6:38] The importance of the MC’s job at a wedding
  • [11:49] How an MC can help the speeches at a wedding reception not go on too long
  • [14:00] How the MC plays the role of the mediator at the wedding.
  • [19:35] Introduction of Samantha Savoia, professional MC in Toronto, Canada
  • [23:26] Samantha describes how people connect and hire her to be the MC at the wedding
  • [26:10] Tips for being a great wedding MC
  • [28:12] How to deal with bad speeches
  • [32:24] How to get in touch with Samantha Savoia to MC your wedding
  • [34:10] Having confidence when doing any kind of public speaking
  • [40:05] Tips for how to keep the speech interesting
  • [45:23] It is great to be funny in your speech, but it is even better to be authentic and sentimental
  • [48:19] How do you create space as an MC to allow for meaningful, touching speeches
  • [50:40] Letting more women speak at weddings instead of it just being all men

Photo by Andreas Rønningen

Memorable Quotes

  • “When you MC a wedding, you have a big responsibility on your shoulders because you’re not only running that day, you also set the tone.
  • “Five minutes is a great starting point for a speech”
  • “Tony you’re not funny. Wind it down. You’re not that great Tony. I’ll have the microphone, let’s move on with your life.”
  • “Breathing is very important. If you take some deep breaths before you do any kind of public speaking I swear to you, you will calm down.”
  • “Put the strongest person last. You want a big finish.”
  • “Break the rules if it means you are going to have a better day.”

Meet This Episode’s Guests

Julia Zemiro is a French-born Australian television presenter, radio host, actress, singer, writer and comedian. She is best known as the host of the music quiz and live performance show RocKwiz. She is a professional public speaker with great advice for how to make wedding speeches and toasts great.

Samantha Savoia is a professional MC in Toronta, Canada. She works for an in-house DJ company and is available for events and weddings. 

Show image by Everton Vila  

With thanks to our Bridechilla Partners

November 26, 2018
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Styled Wedding Shoots

Cozy Fall Family Style Wedding Inspiration

by Aleisha October 16, 2018
written by Aleisha

Cozy, family style wedding inspiration for fall. Bring family and friends together over good food, great company, and spiked coffees.

Photographer, Krishna Sutherland, shares this bold, fall-inspired styled shoot perfect for lovers of pumpkin spice and cozy sweaters... and its anything but basic!

Krishna: Our goal was to combine a romantic fall look & add a cozy family style feel throughout. We chose a bold seasonal color palette of teal, raspberry, burnt orange & burgundy to tie together the floral designs and tablescapes.

For this styled shoot I was inspired by my love for the fall & obsession for bright beautiful colors. The changing of the seasons brings in some amazing deep colors but I always love that pop of bright color in the distance! The fall season also brings one of my favorite holidays, Thanksgiving, gathering families all together. We wanted to communicate that cozy feeling of home through our designs.

Rockstar Vendors:

Photographer: Krishna Sutherland Photography

Etsy Designer: The Chelsea Collection

Caterer: Ooh La La Catering GA

Floral Designer: Blossoms Florist

Equipment Rentals: Baileyroad Vintage Rental

Videographer: Images4Memories

Invitation Designer: Robbin’s Nest Design Studio

Makeup Artist: Jenny Rosalyn Artistry

Bakery: Red Balloon Baking Company

Ring Designer: Satterfield and Dempsy Jewelers​

Ribbon: Ribbons Nest

Apparel: Alexandra's Formals

Cake Designer: Make it Cake

Event Venue: Valley View Barn and Mills Events

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October 16, 2018
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Bridechilla BlogBridechilla Podcast

287- Adding Non-Traditional Details to Your Wedding

by Aleisha September 25, 2017
written by Aleisha

This week's episode of the Bridechilla podcast is all about adding non-traditional details to your wedding celebrations.  I'm joined by Bridechilla Graduate and Wedding Coordinator Erica Greenwold Reisen from Folie à Deux Events who shares some of her favourite ways to mix up the program and add some extra personality and surprises to your wedding day.  It's great to think outside the box especially with the format of your day. 

We are so used to the "normal" way of organising the day, guests arrive, arrival of the bridal party and couple, Ceremony, cocktail hour and then reception... that when someone does something different it seems very risqué when in fact that is part of the fun of being a Bridechilla you can do whatever the hell you like! 

Listen to episode 287 of Bridechilla

Wedding Weekend

A popular alternative to the standard wedding format is the Wedding Weekend. Plan a variety of events with your guests over the course of a weekend. This is a great option for those with a lot of guests coming from out of town or if you are doing a destination event. By having multiple smaller events you have more time to connect with your guests. A wonderful example of this is Bridechilla Cali’s San Francisco Wedding Weekend complete with a BBQ in a park, a trip to wine country, a dance party, and brunch!

Pop Up Wedding

For our more introverted Bridechillas & Groomchillas who aren’t exactly looking forward to a huge event or being the center of attention, maybe a smaller more spontaneous event is for you. Pop Up weddings are usually pre-planned packages for a small event in a unique location and the planner handles all the details for your event. All you do is book the pop up wedding and show up with your guests! Pop ups are usually a step above just eloping and make it easy to throw a little celebration with your close friends and family. There are wedding planners who specialize in Pop Up Weddings and you can learn more in our recent blog post all about Pop Up Weddings!

Styled Elopement

Styled Elopements are also another option if you want something more than just getting hitched at the courthouse but don’t want to throw a huge soiree! Pick a rad location, find an officiant, some witnesses and that is all you really need - but hiring a cool photographer and a stylist to design the elopement can make it feel extra special and personal. You can still have a celebration with your friends and family later too, but if you want your ceremony to be private, this is probably the best option for you!

Adapting Traditions

If you do plan to have a standard one-day wedding event and just want to place more importance on your ceremony, it’s great if you can get your guests more involved. Make the ceremony a bigger part of the day by making it more interactive and less performative. One of my favorite ways to include your guests is the Quaker wedding tradition of a ceremony in the round (everyone is in a circle)  and your friends and family are invited to speak if they feel moved to. The ceremony itself is more about supporting and uplifting the couple getting married. Traditionally Quaker ceremonies are also Self-Uniting (no officiant) but that may or may not be legal where you are, but the part where your friends and family share can be added to any wedding!

Another tradition that can be adapted to get your family and friends more involved is the Jewish tradition of the Seven Blessings. Invite seven of your friends or family members to give a blessing for your marriage. Even though this particular tradition is religious, you could absolutely adapt the idea for a non-religious or interfaith wedding.

Hand fastings are another cool way of changing up the ceremony format. Traditionally speaking, the hand fasting would be performed as a betrothal ritual and sometimes used to publicly renew your vows. Religious ceremonies would be held as well, but the Hand fasting was performed in front of your community who would also make promises to support you and your relationship.

Ditching the Ceremony/Reception Format Entirely

At most weddings, your guests arrive and file into seats to watch you get hitched. Why not shake it up a bit and have your ceremony during the party? This works great if you are having a more informal cocktail party or an intimate dinner party or restaurant wedding. Mingle with your guests, share some drinks and food, and then have your ceremony sometime in the middle of the event. By removing the traditional elements like the processional and a separate ceremony location your event will feel less structured, and less like a show you are putting on for your guests.

Reshaping the Traditional Ceremony

Arriving to the ceremony together or even greeting your guests can be another nice way to break from tradition. Greet your guests as they arrive! Even if you still plan to do a formal ceremony with a processional, welcoming your guests as they arrive is a great personal touch. You could even wait to put on your dress so it's still a surprise!

Creating a fully customized ceremony incorporating your values, culture, and interests can make your ceremony more unique and meaningful. Go beyond just writing vows and write a mission statement for your marriage. Do not feel limited to the standard ceremony script!

Have a First Look

Most of these format breaking suggestions rely on the assumption that you are ok with seeing your fiance before the ceremony. We recommend a first look not only because it makes coordination of your day a bit easier, but it can be great if you are feeling nervous or anxious to have a moment with your fiance before the ceremony.

Bonus ideas

Pot luck dinner or desserts can be a lovely way to get your friends and family involved your wedding! Communal or family style dinner service can also change the feel of your reception to be more intimate and engaging for your guests.

Have an open mic at your reception and invite friends and family to share songs, poems, or even a stand-up set at the reception! If you have a musical group of friends, a sing-along or karaoke could be a lot of fun! 

In short, there are so many ways you can introduce non-traditional details into your weddings. Most importantly, never feel limited by a format, tradition, or societal norms. Take what works, ditch or re-work the rest!

September 25, 2017
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Bridechilla BlogGuest Post

The Bridechilla Guide to Unforgettable Wedding Toasts

by Aleisha June 29, 2017
written by Aleisha

By Pete Honsberger, author of Don't Burn Your Toast: The Guide to an Unforgettable Wedding Toast

Wedding toasts are probably not the top of your 'things you should worry about'. By the time the big day arrives, Bridechillas and Groomchillas probably think they have exhausted their list of possible worries. They’ve arranged for the transportation, finished the guest list (until cousin Ronny brings his buddies for the free alcohol), taken care of the out-of-towners, and finished the bridal party roll call before the ceremony.

Everyone is accounted for, though one groomsman is already sweaty and smells like Irish whiskey. And how has a bridesmaid misplaced her flowers within 10 minutes? Oops, false alarm. Found them in the ladies’ room.

Minor hitches aside, for the first time in months, couples can take a deep breath because they listened faithfully to the Bridechilla Podcast and covered everything on the wedding checklist. Now, it’s time to enjoy the day!
Well, there is one more little thing. It’s probably nothing. Not worth a second thought.
Or is it?
It’s the speeches at the reception. The best man and maid of honor are presenting their toasts to the audience. The anxiety may come flooding in. Which stories will they tell? How will the crowd react? Will people be bored, or worse, offended? Will we be unfairly judged because something that happened years ago is brought up tonight? HOW DO I STOP THIS?

Photo by Alasdair Elmes

Give guidance to your Toasters

You’ve got a right to be concerned about the toasts. For one thing, you’ve spent too much time and money preparing for the special day to have it fall apart because of an obnoxious speech. Also, you may want to make a good impression with your new spouse’s friends and family. Almost just as bad would be boring, forgettable, “snooze-fest” toasts that elicit no emotional connection from the crowd. But worry no longer! Here are a few reasonable requests you can make to both speech-givers before the wedding to help you sleep easily:

Bridechilla Founder Aleisha

Tips for 'Toast making' communication

● Request (or require) that the toaster doesn’t say anything downright mean – This day is to honor you and the love of your life, not to give your best man/maid of honor a platform to grind an ax or settle an old dispute. There’s no need to be mean in a toast.

● Request that the toaster avoids saying anything sexually suggestive – Do you remember watching movies with your parents as a kid? Brief sex scenes could be a little uncomfortable, though sometimes a bit funny when they were in the room. But every once in awhile, at least in our household, I’d get stuck in the living room watching a 10-minute steamy sex scene, cringing and squirming along with my folks, wishing it would end. That’s the barometer I use for telling saucy jokes in your speech. A little is ok, but too much doesn’t do anyone good.

● Request that the toaster limits the stories of drunken escapades – I get it, some of our best stories were created after we knocked back some drinks and got into mischief. However, there’s a difference between mixing in one or two memories to add humor to the speech and painting the bride/groom in a bad light. Your best man/maid of honor should respect this difference.

What if you’re the one giving a Toast?

Never forget through this process that your #1 objective is to honor the bride & groom.

Of course, you want to entertain the crowd, but that’ll come naturally if you’ve prepared and poured your heart into the speech.

Whether you’re looking for one more piece to complete your toast, or you’re staring at a blank page unsure where to start, I’m here to help. If you follow the steps below, you’ll be set up for a smashing success. I call them the Five CRUCIAL COGS to an unforgettable wedding speech:

1. The Opener – Whether it’s with one word, a quote, memorable anecdote, open-ended question, or another dynamite idea, you absolutely must grab the audience’s undivided attention right away!

2. Honoring the Past – You are closer to the bride & groom than most people in the room, and you can offer a unique perspective. Pull a few favorite memories from the vault and share them.

3. Present and Future – Give a few words about the bride & groom’s relationship and what you see for them in the future (keeping it positive, of course).

4. The Significant Other – Do not skip this or I’ll come after you! Seriously, though, if you’re the best man, don’t ignore the bride in your toast. Same for you maids of honor. Make sure to acknowledge the groom’s existence in an interesting and memorable way.

5. The Big Finish – This is your mic drop. It’s the funniest story, the poem/short story that best sums up their relationship, or your sincere final statement before asking the room to raise their champagne glasses.

I delivered my first wedding toast in 2012. It was my brother’s weddings, and while I didn’t know it at the time, I was following the steps above. The result was an all-rhyming poem of a speech that had the crowd and (most importantly) the bride & groom rolling in laughter with my Big Finish. If you’d like to see that toast in its entirety, pick up a copy of my book, Don’t Burn Your Toast: THE Guide to an Unforgettable Wedding Toast. 

Because I love you all, I’ll mail a signed copy of the book to the first two lucky Bridechilla fans who read this post and get in touch at pete.honsberger@gmail.com. Happy Days!

June 29, 2017
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274- How to Fill the Dance Floor At Your Wedding

by Aleisha June 26, 2017
written by Aleisha

We've all been to events and weddings that on paper should have the most amazing dancing vibes, but when the music starts, that dance floor is deader than a nightclub at 7 pm.The DJ tries their best; there's always the lone enthusiastic drunk guest swaying on their own who yells at the other guests to join them, 'DANCE...WHY AREN'T YOU ALL DANCING?'

It's a real pickle. So, to help ensure that your wedding reception dance floor is filled with booty shaking, guests, making shapes and reaching for the lasers I have invited DJ Andrew McClelland (a very fine party DJ) to share with us his best dance floor fillers and regale us with some of his best wedding DJ stories.

Andrew's played thousands of gigs at events, awards ceremonies, clubs and weddings all over the world. Andrew is the sort of DJ you should hire for your wedding because he listens to a huge amount of different music and plays for the crowd.He DJs. He Dances. He MCs and he is an award-winning comedian. You won't be disappointed with this episode of the show.

DJ Andrew McClelland's Best Dance Floor Filler Recommendations.

Although these can change from country to country and crowd to crowd here are some songs which are nigh infallible on wedding dance floors. If you know your crowd you can get much more creative than this, but the classics remain;

I’m a Believer - The Monkees

A cracking tune by an unfairly underrated 60s boy band, young people know this because of Shrek, older people know it because they were there, Neil Diamond fans know it because he wrote it. This can get almost any dance floor going and thematically it’s right on point.

Crazy in Love - Beyonce

A number one hit known by all, this song has nigh everything; a massive, fat horn section, and banging Motown beat, a cracking dance routine that some in your crowd may know, a big joyous crescendo and it’s a duet by a married couple about being madly in love. You can even find a version without Jay Z’s rap section if you find that distracting. It may not get everyone on the floor, but anyone under 40 or over 12 will go mad for it, and that’s enough for a good floor.

You Make My Dreams Come True - Hall and Oates

What’s not to love about this 80s classic? It’s got a great regular beat, cracking melody and everyone at least kinda remembers it enough to dance to it. And who doesn’t like the 80s?

Can’t Stop the Feeling - Justin Timberlake

The kids know it cos it’s from some kids movie, the millennials know it cos it JT, the oldies may not know it, but it’s funky as all get out and has some sweet late disco sounds in it too and the chorus comes back so often that by the end of your first listening you can sing along. So yeah, what’s not to like? Nothing. Shake your ass!

Valerie (version) - Amy Winehouse

Oldies like it because it sounds like an old track, youngies like it because it isn’t. This track is often a bit of a surprise for many people as it’s not too overplayed, but if you already know it you get to feel vindicated for knowing a slightly alternative banger, and if you don’t know it the hard soul beat will get you dancing anyhow. Pair it with The Supremes version of ‘You Can’t Hurry Love’ and you’ve got an inter-generational smash on your hands.

There’s thousands more d-floor killers of course. US crowds dig a little more hip-hop and R&B, UK crowds like their indie, soul and rock a bit more and New Zealanders are charmingly supportive of their local scene, but wherever you go weddings are about joy and so is dancing, so throw yourself on to the floor and get a DJ who loves it too.

dance floor

Potentially Inappropriate (Dark) Songs To Leave Off The List

There is no dissing these songs they're all great and popular in their own way but as we talk about in the episode, some songs have strong themes, or murder, rape and general nastiness and perhaps are a little debbie downer for a first dance- saying that, you are a Bridechilla and you can do whatever the hell you want!

I still haven't found what I am looking for- U2

I mean this feels a little obvious but perhaps leave Bono and his mates looking for someone until the after party?

Delilah- Tom Jones
Again, another song that our parent all seem to love but where he stabs his girlfriend to death in a fit of jealousy. Happy Days!

Smack my Bitch up- The Prodigy
Again as a method of remembering mind raving from the 90s= great 
At a wedding= risky. 

Suspicious Minds - Elvis Presley
As much as I bloody adore this song, there are probably more romantic, less 'I'm suspicious of your wandering eyes' songs to Elvis songs to gyrate to on your wedding day. 

D-I-V-O-R-C-E - Tammy Wynette
Love you Tammy but, I mean come on.

Closer- Nine Inch Nails

You let me violate you
You let me desecrate you
You let me penetrate you
....oh and also the bit where he says 'I want to fuck you like an animal. 

Mack the Knife- Frank Sinatra- Bobby Darin

We love some crooning! Just remember this one is all about a criminal murderous pimp who likes some stabby stabby. 

Gold Digger - Kanye West
Think this one is pretty self-explanatory.  

Love Will Tear Us Apart - Joy Division
And ambitions are low
And the resentment rides high
But emotions wont grow
And were changing our ways,
Taking different roads
Then love, love will tear us apart again
Nuff said yeah?

Better Man - Pearl Jam

But if you could find a better man, you might not be with this man today, yes?

Bitter Sweet Symphony- The Verve
A song about the feeling of being trapped and powerless to change your behavior or your life due to circumstances beyond your control...happy wedding!

​

About Andrew McClelland

Andrew McClelland is a very fine party DJ. He's played thousands of gigs at events, awards ceremonies, clubs and weddings all over the world. But he hasn't let that go to his head.
Andrew listens to a huge amount of different music plays for the crowd.
Your crowd. He DJs. He Dances. He MCs and he is an award winning comedian. You won't be disappointed.

Follow Andrew on Facebook

Follow Andrew on Instagram Visit his HQ Here! http://www.djandrewmcclelland.com/

June 26, 2017
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Bridechilla BlogBridechilla Podcast

273- Choosing an Alternative Wedding Venue

by Aleisha June 19, 2017
written by Aleisha

Choosing where you are getting married, your wedding venue is a big step in the wedding planning process and one that pretty much guides all of your other decisions along the way. In this episode of the Bridechilla Podcast, with guest Yael from Splacer.co, and and this post, we explore everything you need to think about when it comes to choosing your venue, from the logistics (like the importance of insurance and contracts) to thinking about all of the wonderful venue options that you may never have even considered.

Listen to the Episode

Finding a venue that suits you

Consider the possibilities! Did you always dream of a backyard wedding but never had the backyard to make it happen? Looking to create something on a budget at home in your apartment? Would your guests be up for a bit of glamping? There are so many options these days when it comes to alternative venues that one of the biggest hurdles is navigating what’s right for you and your guests. Like any venue search, starting with time of year will help narrow down availability and set the tone for the rest of the decision making.

wedding venue

Manhattan townhouse (formerly a synagogue)

Create a vision that’s truly yours

One of the best things about choosing a nontraditional venue is that you can make your own choices every step of the way. The result is an experience that you as a couple can truly identify with. If you’re an artist, you can get married in a gallery, a chef in a culinary space, a historian in a landmark building. With an alternative space also comes the option to direct the flow of the event in alternative way – why not eat, dance and do the ceremony later?!

wedding venue

Exposed Brick Industrial Chic Loft

Preparing the logistics

Ask lots of questions! Some common details you may want to inquire about: capacity, sound system (limits on volume), dance floor, lighting, time limitations, and insurance. It is very easy to add event insurance and there are many solutions in the market today that are particularly suitable for weddings. At Splacer, our marketplace is geared towards events so all venues, whether residential or commercial, are aware of the activities going on in their space and are able to help you with many of these logistics.

wedding venue

Renovated barn

Working with outside vendors

You’ll want to make sure you have a designated area for vendors to load in, set up, and store what’s not being used. If you’re working with an open space, there are ways to make unsightly equipment blend into decor. Try setting up dividers and covering them in a fabric to match your tablecloths. Because it may be the first time various vendors are working together, take the time at the start of the event to set up a quick “who’s who” meeting so that vendors can feel like one big team working towards the same goal – creating a magical event for YOU!

wedding venue

Glamping grounds

Enjoying the experience

Remember that you chose to go the nontraditional route for a reason. Try to abandon stereotypes and notions of what you think your wedding “should” be like. Guests will love seeing all of the thought you put into creating an experience that is so personal to you – from the decor and the music, to the cocktails and catering choices. Even though you may have had a larger role in the organization and planning than you would typically have at a more traditional venue, your only job on wedding day is to enjoy and let your friends and family enjoy along with you!

wedding venue

Geodesic dome in the wild

Historic hillside estate

About Splacer:
Splacer is on online marketplace that allows people to list, discover and book unique spaces for events of any type, shape or size – from dinners, parties, engagement and wedding celebrations, corporate events, fashion shows, photo shoots, art exhibits, film productions and more.

June 19, 2017
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Hi, I’m Aleisha

Hi, I’m Aleisha

Founder of Bridechilla

I created The Bridechilla Podcast, Guides and Facebook Community to empower you to plan an awesome wedding day and put all of the wedstress and obligation straight in the Fuck It Bucket!
With 350+ episodes of Bridechilla, 3 Guides and hundreds of blogs, get started on your path to wedding planning zen!

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